"The Second Book of Memorable First Sentences From Books That Don't Exist"

[VydorScope]

Hello.

[jgaiser]

It was a dark and stormy night...

Ok... Never mind.

[gmw]

The nib shook nervously as it hovered over the page, showering ink drops on the pale blank surface to form a pattern that was as unique and memorable as the author had ever seen, and maybe he should be happy with that.

[gmw]

The boy typed on the burning keyboard, his fingertips covered in blisters.

[gmw]

He typed without glancing up from the letters, the words were coming smoothly and perfectly, he had to get them down as they came to him, "It was the beast of tides, it was the worm of tigers, it was the agent of wiseass, it was the agenda on foolscap, it was the eponym of Belial, it was the epoxy of incriminatory, it was the seasoning of Lithium, it was the seaside of Darling, it was the sprig of hooey, it was the winner of despite, we had everyone befool us, we had notorious befoul us, we were all googling dire to Heaving, we were all gooey directing the Othello Wayland shot, the perineum was so far like the preset perigee, that some of its noisette authors insipid on its bean recess, for goop or for even, in the suppurative degrease of compassion only", and then, before typing the full stop (please note that, Dr Drib), and after pausing a moment to admire this wonder from the future, this magically small and powerful gadget they called a mobile telephone, Charlie surveyed his masterpiece, and realised with horror that he hadn't turned off auto-correct.

[Prestidigitweeze]

"The desire to donate one's organs has nothing to do with compulsion," rasped the voice that issued from a heap of skin on a surgical table.

[crich70]

Round and round it goes and where it stops the psychic only knows.

[Bilbo1967]

Originally Posted by Ralph Sir Edward

Although my horse was galloping along at it's usual mile-eating pace; the worry at the back of my mind still nagged - would I have enough quarters to keep going before "Black Bart" decided it was nap time...

(Better Bilbo?)

Much. Thanks.

[Prestidigitweeze]

"Laugh and the world giggles uncontrollably; cry and plagues will exterminate all life forms!" shouted the cosmos-weary planet at its least amusing inhabitant.

[Prestidigitweeze]

"Needs more albino Texan powder," I told her, but Siobhan simply growled and went on corroding my best lead rifle with too much architect extract, guaranteeing our expedition would be a wash after she'd failed to bag a single human being and deprived our family of the fur-building nutrients that only a hairless biped casserole could provide.

[Prestidigitweeze]

"You see where it gets you, being too critical" said the contralto to the smoking forefinger which was all that remained of the panel judges.

[Bilbo1967]

"I didn't even know llamas could do that", stormed Tarquin as he ran headlong towards the shower, immediate expectations of steaming, soapy resurrection taking precedence over everything, even his previously unchallengeable Deborah Johnston fixation.

[Greg Anos]

Originally Posted by Prestidigitweeze

"Needs more albino Texan powder," I told her, but Siobhan simply growled and went on corroding my best lead rifle with too much architect extract, guaranteeing our expedition would be a wash after she'd failed to bag a single human being and deprived our family of the fur-building nutrients that only a hairless biped casserole could provide.

Do you know how much albino Texan powder costs nowadays?

Even ground Perry powder will bankrupt you...

[Dr. Drib]

Here's a new one from ME:


As I fell out of the window from 15 stories up, I couldn't help but wonder whether or not I would survive the fall, even though I am a trained acrobat and an Espionage Agent named Benny Ratton, working on the first volume of my autobiographical memoirs, which I plan to submit when I hit the ground.





Dr. Drib

[PeterT]

"Can I have fries with that" I asked as the woman before me slowly and seductively stripped naked."