Free (Kindle KDP) Rhino History, Other Lies and All That Jazz [Canadian Politics]

[ATDrake]

Once again, the KDP Select exclusive-or-else-but-you-get-5-days-free-out-of-90-as-long-as-thou-shalt-have-no-other-stores-before-Amazon slushpile spits out something worthwhile.

Not gonna lie, I clapped my hands like a seal when I saw this.

If, understandably, you are not a Canadian and therefore do not know le Parti Rhinocéros (the Rhinoceros Party), well, there is a sad lack in your life which happily, can be remedied this very day.

For many decades, the Rhinos were our 4th-party "protest vote" receiver. It was the joke alternative to our 3 majors, and eventually actually garnered enough votes to be able to officially register as an official political party with Elections Canada.

Their platforms included:

• Building one nuclear power plant per household, including monthly distributions of lead underwear to Canadians. Indoor lighting would then be provided by radioactive citizens.
• Instituting English, French and illiteracy as Canada's three official languages.
• Changing Canada's currency to bubble gum, so it could be inflated or deflated at will.
• Making the Canadian climate more temperate by tapping into the natural resource of hot air in Ottawa.

and many other loltastic things you can see at the Wikipedia article for the classic incarnation of the party.

One of the later incarnations had a leader who legally changed his name to "Sa Tan" so he could file a lawsuit against the Crown as Satan vs Her Majesty the Queen.

So with that in mind, the following history of the Rhino Party is probably all a pile of made up blatant lies, but it's going to be a loltastically awesome pile of made up blatant lies.

And for those of you who place no value on loltastically awesome piles of made up blatant lies because you have no soul, there's also a bunch of really good backlist books across several genres, including a rather nifty automobile history and an e-book original Piers Anthony YA fantasy.

Rhino History, Other Lies and All That Jazz by one Gonzo Fubar Van Rasputin, is probably exactly what it says in the title.

This will be free for who knows how long with or without DRM which none of us can easily tell any longer, thanks to Amazon's really unhelpful changes to the Product Description info, @ Amazon main UK DE ES FR IT

Description
Finally, the history of the most fabled political beast in the world is told.

The Rhinos - who promised to repeal the law of gravity, declared war on Belgium, fielded 54 drunks for Vancouver's mayoralty, and ran a man legally known as Satan in a bible belt riding - have amused voters and horrified politicians since 1963.

The Rhinos were so feared and loathed by the Canadian political establishment that then Prime Minister Lyin' Brian Mulroney raped the Constitution to destroy them in 1993.

Over the 15 year period that followed the Rhinos made more comebacks than The Who, finally rising to power in the miraculous events of 2008. Her Majesty, Queen Elizabeth II, was not amused. Not amused at all. Her Majesty... ah, but wait, let's not give away the ending.

In this tour de farce author GONZO FUBAR VAN RASPUTIN tells all, and then some, for the first time

The rest of today's preliminary slushpile trawl (I might go back and look at some of the more marginal things and do the ISFDB checking later). Not sorted because I really want to get some sleep, although I did move the three most important/interesting-looking things to the top.

Lawrence R. Gustin has a number of non-fiction automotive history books out from university presses and such. This one was 2006-hardcovered by Wayne State University Press and has been revised and updated: David Buick's Marvelous Motor Car From the blurb, it's received a lot of praise from academics and historians.

Piers Anthony offers a YA fantasy e-book original: Pandora Park A note in the blurb says the publisher is offering the sequels for 99 cents on sale for the next three days as a special promotion.

I.J. Parker offers a 2003-Minotaur published historical mystery set in 11th century Japan, which looks awesome: The Hell Screen (A Sugawara Akitada Novel)

HarperCollins-published Sharon Ihle offers another historical western romance: River Song

Canadian Lou Allin offers a 2005 Five Star-published mystery with a professor sleuthing at a university in Michigan: A Little Learning is a Murderous Thing (Maddie Temple)

Minotaur-published Agatha Award-nominee Elena Santangelo offers a short story which from the publication info was apparently originally in Alfred Hitchcock's Mystery Magazine: Ring of Truth

Rosalie Moore, who says that her self-published historical romance netted her some specific accolade from that RWA Golden Heart Award thing offers an historical western short story which may or may not also be a romance: Showdown at Charbonet's

Previously-featured Edward G. Talbot, who is the penname of two authors who have ISFDB entries, offers a spooky Arthurian short: Full Moon Over Camelot

Marsha Canham offers a 1992-Dell paperbacked historical western romance: Under the Desert Moon

Kensingon-published Charlie Carillo repeats his 1986 literary fiction novel which was named one of the ALA best books of the year: Shepherd Avenue

New Zealand author Tracie McBride (ISFDB entry) offers this collection co-authored with John Irving Irvine: April Fool and other Antipodean horror stories

Previously-featured Ten Speed Press non-fiction writer Carol Buchanan offers a western historical short story: Stranger Riding By

John Bushore, who has minor ISFDB credits and says he has won a specified particular award in certain years, offers a literally gender-bending fairy tale fantasy novel (may end in romance or erotica): Prisoners of Gender He's also got some sort of historical WWII era coming-of-age-looking novel: Necessary Evil

Previously-featured ISFDB-ed-short-stories Thomas M. Malafarina offers his debut horror novel set in 1965 Pennsylvania: 99 Souls

Anne Frasier/Theresa Weir returns with her 2003-Onyx-paperbacked FBI agent vs serial killer thriller: Sleep Tight

Previously-featured maybe-self-published Bob Frey returns with an omnibus edition of two more of his mystery/thrillers starring a gay LAPD detective if you've been collecting them: The Bashful Vampire Murder & Comic Book Murders (Frank Callahan Mysteries)

Mainak Dhar, author of Zombiestan, returns with a military/political thriller which he says has been re-published by a local Indian house (he does not name which one) and includes praise in the blurb from local Indian-interest newspapers: Line of Control- A Thriller on the Coming War in Asia

Previously-featured Jove-published Robert W. Walker returns with a sci-fi horror thriller: Titanic 2012 (Curse of RMS Titanic - an Inspector Alastair Ransom title)

Elaine Bergstrom wrote a bunch of unusual historical vampire books back in the day. I know because I have some of them actually sitting on my bookshelf, a few which IIRC acquired during a used/backstock sale. She offers the one in her Austra family series which explains all about Elizabeth Bathory, originally paperbacked by Ace in 1994: Daughter of the Night

Anthony Bruno offers a 1997-Forge-published "dark comic thriller": Devil's Food (A Loretta Kovacs thriller)

ISFDB-ed Aaron Polson returns with: Vengeful Spirits: A Supernatural Thriller

Previously-featured Signet-published children's writer Barbara Bartholomew offers offers some sort of YA fantasy take on the British royal family: Royal Blood (Chronicles of Endymion)

Doctor Who tie-in novel writer Paul Finch (middling-extensive ISFDB entry) offers the self-explanatory: Medi-Evil 1 (A collection of historical terror and fantasy)

HarperCollins/Scholastic New Zealand writer Linda McNabb returns with another kids/YA fantasy with dragons in it: The Last Star

Previously-featured Jane Toombs returns with another in her historical California maybe-romance saga if you've been following them: Golden Chances Book 6 - The Deceiver

Probably self-pub Canadian Cindy Bouchard offers another in her BC-set historical family drama if you've been following them: Wildest Dreams 1911 (Princes of the North)

Clarissa Yip is published by erotic romance specialty press Decadent Publishing. This is one of her f/m contemporary erotic romance novels: One Chance

Total E-Bound-published Jenna Byrnes returns with another probably-erotic f/m romance short: Windfall

Berkley-published Erin Quinn offers what looks like a romantic suspense: Whispers This is published by Books We Love/BWLPP, who've also put out the Jane Toombs and Jenna Byrnes titles above and they have a few freebies today which you can try digging out of the jumble of $0.00 and Prime Lending "free" titles which Amazon insists on mingling together: Linkage to start digging and dig some more

Lawrence D. Elliott says his work has appeared in those Chicken Soup for the Soul anthologies. Here is his self-explanatory anecdotal self-help guide: Bitte was? An American author's misadventures in the German language

ISFDB-ed David Bain offers another short story: The Streetlight Filled with Flowers

And on the theme of decidedly niche specialty cookbooks that have been going around lately: How To Improve Your Sex Life In 69 Erotic Recipes This actually looks quite nice, with mini-essays on the history of the aphrodisiac foods included.

Enjoy, especially if you discover the everlasting joy and wonder of including rhinoceroses in politics or you find you can benefit from that last book.

[Blue Tyson]

Thanks!

380 :-)

[CWatkinsNash]

Yay! Another Sharon Ihle!

370

[Dr. Drib]

Much thanks.

One correction before you start hyperventilating like I did: The co-author mentioned is NOT John Irving, but actually John Irvine.


Don

[ATDrake]

Okay, fixed. I'm afraid I don't read/type all that well at 4 am in the morning.

Fun fact: John Irving (or at least someone going by the same name) does in fact have a minor ISFDB entry. Wikipedia entry for comparison purposes.

Oh, and hey, there's also two notable Canadians by that name, including a steamship captain, which gives me the perfect excuse to link this Amazon book which could be of possible usefulness to the latter, as the customer-submitted reviews have no hesitation in telling you.

Personal favourite review, this one which shares a charming anecdote about:

It is amazing how, even in ancient cultures which may seem rather primitive to us today, great minds arose that were centuries ahead of their time.

I myself wasn't aware that, directly after the ten thousand spied the ocean and cried "Thalassa! Thalassa!" ("The sea! The sea!") in joy at their deliverance, Xenophon turned and ran back inland, crying "Naus megala! Naus megala!" ("Huge ship! Huge ship!").

Another instance in which his remarkable leadership qualities saved the expedition from certain disaster.

This is probably a lot funnier if you've ever read anything about Ancient Greek history and/or studied the language.

[Dr. Drib]

I really appreciate all the work you're doing gathering these together.

Irving is one of those authors that I'll pay over $20 in order to read one of his new books in ebook format (being here in Peru.)

I also collect his work in hardback and have his 2nd and 3rd novels in First American Edition with DJ.

I hope you're able to continue doing this, but don't forget to get some sleep first!


Don

[Blue Tyson]

So, for your cracktastic book of the day :-

Mein Poni-Kampf: Bio of Leader of Nazi Ponies (Poniworld Chronicles #2)

"This second stand-alone volume of the Poniworld Chronicles shifts its attention onto one of the most controversial figures in Poniworld history, Adolf Poni. Follow him as he goes from being a child with a love of dunking cookies in milk to being a murderous adult. Find out how a strawberry milk mustache led to mass murder. This account is humorous and horrific at the same time. For mature audiences. This ain't your little sister's book about Nazi ponies."

For added bad taste, the description has the Battle Hymn of the Nazi Ponies

!!

[ATDrake]

Update time:

Nina Bruhns returns with a 2001-Harlequin Silhouette: Warrior's Bride (full-length western contemporary romance, The Warriors)

Darlene Gardner offers a 2002-Dorchester/Love Spell apparently-comedic pregnancy contemporary romance:The Misconception

Alberta-based Newfoundlander Krista D. Ball has had a book out from Mundania Press, which was originally set up to publish Piers Anthony's less mainstream commercially-viable stuff. She offers a short story: The Amazing Transformation of Wicca Dog

The probably-pseudonymous Sparkle Hayter offers a "hilarious crime romp" that was paperbacked by Penguin in 1995 and has a favourable review from Publisher's Weekly: What's a Girl Gotta Do? (A Robin Hudson Mystery)

This follow-up to George Orwell's Animal Farm by one Jan Edwards writing as Jane Doe really was paperbacked in 1996 and translated into German like the blurb says. Both of them may be self-pub efforts, but nevertheless if you're interested: Anarchist Farm

Barbara Hay says she has written a column for the Sooner Catholic newsletter and local Oklahoma newspapers and Google appears to back her up. Here is her debut YA mystery/adventure novel involving the Native American Ponca people: Lesson of the White Eagle

Kensington-published Andy Schell, who also says he used to write freelance jokes for comedian Joan Rivers, offers a humorous general fiction novel about figure skating competition rivalries: Flying Camels and Tiger Mothers

Here is another chick-lit/romance from Prospera Publishing, a newbie small UK outlet which had a few other freebies yesterday. Nicky Schmidt's: Naked in Knightsbridge, which has a bunch of Pink Thong Award nominations.

I recognize Vincent Zandri's name because he was a total spammer on the Amazon Discussion boards for Kindle and Kindle-related stuff back when Amazon didn't auto-delete any self-promo outside the special self-pub author cornfield. He not only repeatedly kept plugging his books under his own name, but he would also rope in either genuine relatives or simple sockpuppets with the same last name who would spam on his behalf and pretend to be all indignant because they weren't promoting their own books, no matter how often the regular posters would tell him to stop creating so many threads for his books and please just stick to creating one and update it every so often, and they had to resort to using the "was this helpful or not: NO" button to hide his posts, which you may or may not still be able to see on Amazon should you run a search, if they haven't banned and auto-nuked everything. Nevertheless, it turns out he actually was published by Dell (I thought he had to be a total newbie amateur, from the way he behaved) back in the day, so here's one of his horror/thriller novels if you're morbidly curious: The Scream Catcher (not one of the printed ones) This, incidentally, will be the only time I bother to include his stuff. I figure he's more than demonstrated he's got the ability to make sure the prospective audience knows his books are available right there in front of them, whether they like it or not.

Frank Sennett had a couple of mysteries published by Five Star. This is not one of them, but instead a "modern-day Shakespeare in love", based loosely on the works of the bard: Finding Juliet

M. Scott Carter's YA grief-recovery possibly-paranormal coming-of-age is published by the same Roadrunner Press as Barbara Hay's YA novel above. He, too, is an Oklahoman and says he was an editor of his college newspaper: Stealing Kevin's Heart

D.L. Snell has recently contributed to anthologies by Kevin J. Anderson, among others, and here is his ISFDB entry and his short suspense/horror story: House of Flesh

Armand Rosamilia (ISFDB entry) mainly seems to edit anthologies. But his blurb includes praise from Scott Nicholson, whom I've never read, and Laura J. Underwood, whose stories in those Marion Zimmer Bradley anthologies I've enjoyed. Here is his rock n' roll fantasy/horror adventure: Death Metal

Previously-featured minor ISFDB-ed Canadian Chantal Boudreau contributes to this anthology of zombie stories all written by women horror writers: Hell Hath No Fury

David B. Silva, whose middling-extensive credits can be seen in his ISFDB entry says he has won both the Bram Stoker and World Fantasy Awards for his short stories, and he offers one of them here (not the award-winning ones): Dwindling

In 2002, the late Virginia Mayo who was a Hollywood actress in the 40s (Wikipedia entry) co-authored an autobiography which is now available for Kindle (but with fewer photos than the paperback, according to the blurb): Virginia Mayo - The Best Years of My Life

Adrian White has had two novels published by Penguin in Ireland. He offers what appears to be a literary fiction novel or collection of short stories. It's really hard to tell from the blurb: Dancing to the End of Love

You can see Paul Pinn's long list of ISFDB credits for short stories published over a couple of decades (at least one of which made it as far as one of those Karl Edward Wagner-edited Year's Best Horror anthologies). And you can pick up his generously-offered freebies which include 2 novels and some collections: Linkage to pull up all 6. It looks like he does mainly horror/thriller/crime but writes across all speculative genres. ISFDB

Jessica Barksdale Inclan offers her 2005-Penguin looks-like-women's fiction maybe-romance novel: Walking with Her Daughter

Esteban Vega has some work out by newbie digital imprint StoneHouse Ink who also brought out Vincent Zandri's book above. I don't recall seeing Vega spamming anywhere, so in the interests of equal opportunity exposure I include his mystery/suspense-looking thing: Baby Blue (A Digital Short)

T. S. O'Rourke is an Irish author with a Wikipedia entry and some interviews in Irish newspapers. Here is his mystery/thriller which appears to be self-pub since Breffni Books seems to only publish his work. Nevertheless, he seems to have some local acclaim, so: Sunset Strip: A Shot of Modern Noir

There's actually quite a lot of stuff I get for myself but never bother including because I know it's of marginal interest for most people.

Nevertheless I include this one because it looks interesting and I like reading about this time period and the self-pub author has included praise from local public radio stations so perhaps her historical novel might also be of interest to others: Montfort The Founder of Parliament The Early Years 1229 to 1243 by Katherine Ashe, who has apparently done the research for it.

Here is Simon de Montfort's Wikipedia entry if you don't know who he is. If you live in an ex-colonial formerly British-ruled nation of any sort, you probably have him to thank, among others, for eventually ending up with your current form of constitutional monarchy/vaguely-democratic republic form of representative government, instead of still having absolute rule.

[Blue Tyson]

Ok thanks. With that and Fictionwise sale

388

[CWatkinsNash]

Spammers, zombies, and rock 'n' roll? Count me in!

31 today. I think 386 total.

[Britomart]

Elizabeth Hanbury, who has two Regency romances published with Robert Hale (UK), offers three Regency novellas: Midsummer Eve at Rookery End.

Jennifer Malin has published a number of Regency romances with Zebra/Kensington and slightly more racy one with Leisure. Now she offers the Regency novella A Perfect Duet for free.

[Dr. Drib]

This Vincent Zandri sounds like a real jerk.

Picked up some more.

Much thanks!



Don

[phloxy]

Originally Posted by ATDrake

Jessica Barksdale Inclan offers her 2005-Penguin looks-like-women's fiction maybe-romance novel: Walking with Her Daughter

Anyone willing to put this on loan to me? I was late to the updates and missed it but would very much like to read it. Send me a message if you're so inclined. Thanks!