Being born. All the fluids, slime, and the thought of coming out of Mom's hoo-hoo. Bleh. That's just terrible.
But, when it comes to gross... I think that all the perks of parenthood (the spew, the poo, and the wee) are all acceptable. Not pleasant, but not anything that I freak out about.
Mine grossest moment comes down to a bug. A big bug. Nasty looking bug.
I was 16, and it was the weekend (cause I was able to sleep in past 6:30am). Dad had come downstairs and was waking my brother up for...something. I think it was an interview he had that morning, but I cannot recall. The noise had put me into a strange state where I was somewhat paralyzed. I could see and hear, but I couldn't move.
After Dad woke Michael up, I laid there. I felt a slight tickle on the small of my back, and it registered as just that: a tickle. A moment later, I felt the same tickle a little higher on my back. This sensation allowed all the synapses to fire and I was now able to move.
I shifted my weight a little bit to get comfy enough to catch a few more zzz's. Shortly after I achieved maximum comfort, that tickle came back. But, instead of a slight tickle, it felt like someone was dragging kitty whiskers up my spine. If I had anything in my bladder, I surely would have peed. A lot.
When I sat up to see just what in the hell was trying to snuggle with me. I was expecting to see a cricket, as they sometimes managed to escape my tarantulas lair. Cricket? No no...
Just one of these. Staring at me. In my bed.
I freaked out. Badly. I made Jamie Lee Curtis sound tame by comparison with the shriek that escaped my face. In a shining moment of stupidity, I swatted the thing off my bed and looked on in horror as it sat on the floor, probably glaring back at me wondering which part of me it wanted to eat and lay eggs in.
Not wanting to give it the satisfaction of an easy meal, I smushed the crap out of it with my didgeridoo. Having never seen one of these miserable little creatures before, I asked Dad what they were. He enlightened me and told me that they ate scorpions. I tore my room apart looking for scorpions. Being in the desert, Bark Scorpions are the nasty ones that hang out. It took me 3 days to feel comfortable enough to sleep with the black-lights off.
It may not be gross in the sense of having fecal matter smeared on them in some way, or having a corpse explode close by... But, this event still gives me the shivers.