[arjaybe]

Originally Posted by gmw

Could you elaborate a bit here? I'm not sure I see both problems. "He is not yet ready..." should probably be "He was not yet ready...". Otherwise the only mix is inside Gavin's dialogue and that seems appropriate to me.

It happens again in the next paragraph, but again it's him thinking. If it's deliberate then at least it's consistent.

Spoiler:

It must not be clear. She only gets the itch when the apartment becomes vacant (sometimes after just one night, sometimes it takes longer). Then she gets the itch which allows her to seek out a new man spend the first night. The itch doesn't happen while the apartment is still occupied. Hence Cooper had to be away for a night (at least), prior to the one being told, so that Vera could get her itch and seek out a new victim.

I did wonder if I should expand on the events of her becoming a ghost, giving a bit more weight to the "first night" aspect of the story. But, of course, this is all being explained as Gavin is falling under the influence so I didn't want to drag it out more than necessary either.

Spoiler:

So she discovered the effect on the old man's first night, and after that she can do it when she gets the itch, but she didn't get the itch before the old man. I think I'd better turn in.-)