That table is wrong about instant on, the iPad is. As soon as I push the button, it's on.
That pictured rock is a museum piece worth hundreds of thousands of dollars. So would be all rocks that old with written text on them.
I won't bring up Internet access, color, movies, photos, magazines, PDF, online purchasing, news, tv access etc., cause that would be unfair...

Oh, and did I mention the iPad is not jealousy proof?