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Old 03-07-2010, 06:27 PM   #44
HansTWN
Wizard
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Posts: 4,538
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Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Taiwan
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Quote:
Originally Posted by gastan View Post
Sue went into the pet shop and immediately spotted a large, beautiful parrot. The sign on the cage said $50.

"Why so little?" Sue asked.

The owner looked at her and said, "Look, I should tell you that this bird used to live in a bawdy house and sometimes it says some pretty vulgar things."

Sue considered and decided to purchase the bird anyway because it was so beautiful. She took it home, hung the cage up, and waited for it to say something. The bird looked around the room, then at her, and said, "New house, new madam."

Sue was a little shocked at the implication but then thought, "That's really not so bad."

When her two teen-age daughters came home from school, the parrot saw them and said, "New house, new madam, new girls."

Sue and her daughters were a bit offended at first but began to laugh, considering how and where the parrot had been raised.

Moments later Sue's husband, Doug, came home from work.

The parrot looked at him and said, "Hi Doug."

Don't trust parrots.
Good one! I have another one.

A man goes to a pet shop and sees 3 cages with 3 parrots. He asked the owner how much the first one is. "500", says the owner. "Why so expensive", asks the man. "He can talk", is the reply.

"And the second one?"

"It costs 1000, because it can speak two languages".

The third bird looks very old, with faded plumage. So the customer remarks "this one must be cheaper".

"Oh no, he costs 2000", the owner answers.

"Can he speak three languages?"

"I have no idea what he can do, but the other two call him boss!".


We actually have a lot of fun with ours when he makes the right remark at the right time. Once my wife was sitting in a chair and working. Our parrot was slowly climbing up the side of her chair to get up to her shoulder. My wife looked down at him and he said "what are you looking at?" Even the tone of his voice was perfectly appropriate.

Last edited by HansTWN; 03-07-2010 at 06:30 PM.
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