Thread: Silliness Convenient Lies
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Old 03-07-2010, 11:33 AM   #4
pshrynk
Beepbeep n beebeep, yeah!
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Location: La Crosse, Wisconsin, aka America's IceBox
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mvisconte View Post
Dibs on captain!
Pshrynk, can you do EMT or emergency surgery in a pinch? HEY! Can anybody sew? Skin? I better clarify that, can anybody sew SKIN? I don't PLAN on us experiencing any punctures, cuts, severences, un-natural openings, dismemberings, removings, lacerations, instickations, slices, chops, improper holing, disemboweling, alien incubations, extreme demon disembarkation, or any other incidents where the warm, wet, red, shiney, liquid inside stuff becomes cold, dried, brown, dull, caked stuff on the outside -- but it never hurts to be prepared. If there's some there who has the guts to collect the pieces (guts) and re-attachment in a reasonably similar position, it may pay off.
For certain values of surgery, sure. I have a sewing machine that does a really nice embroidery job, so after the emergency vasectomy, there will be a quaint little gnome sewing it all together. That plus my name (In full with all attendant titles, real, made up, past present, and anticipated future.) (It's a very versatile machine.) I draw the line at instickations, though. Those wounds squirt something fierce when you pull them out.
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