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Reminds me of the Simpsons:
Bart: [dials 911]
Voice: Hello, and welcome to the Springfield Police Department Resc-u-
Fone[tm]. If you know the name of the felony being committed,
press one. To choose from a list of felonies, press two. If you
are being murdered or calling from a rotary phone, please stay on
the line.
Bart: [growls, punches some numbers]
Voice: You have selected... regicide. If you know the name of the king or queen being murdered, press one!
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