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I think the best way to describe density to a 3rd grader is the statement someone else posted earlier: it's just how tight you've got matter crammed together. You can give her a better visual of density by showing her how light and powdery a pile of flour is, and then adding a little water and kneading it into a tight ball to show how you've increased the density of the flour by just compacting it into a much smaller volume.
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