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Originally Posted by phenomshel
Ok, this is a story I want to hear more about....
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kindlekitten
so how does this work? some cop had a hard on for you and was looking to make anything stick?
do tell!
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I really should have never opened my big mouth about that incident. It was not one of my finest hours, and telling the story accurately makes me look like a complete jerk. Since, however, I was the one who raised the issue, it seems only fair to satisfy the curiosity I've generated.
To begin, it should be noted that I’m an idiot. Most of the time I work hard to conceal this fact, but occasionally events transpire to rip my disguise of semi-normalcy to shreds. It should also be noted that I have a love/hate relationship with police officials. On the one hand, I realize that they have a very difficult and dangerous job to do and for that I admire them. I’ll be the first to admit that I wouldn’t want their job at any salary. Unfortunately, there is also a deep freedom-loving strain within me—sometimes bordering on anarchy—that resists all authority, especially when it appears to be overbearing.
On one particular morning several years ago, there were simply too many police officers on the streets, and each one I saw increased my anger. So I pulled over the next one I saw, and with extremely colorful language thoroughly lambasted the poor fellow and accused our fair city of being a police state. This I did with no audience to impress, only because the appearance of one too many police on the streets made me snap.
Did I mention that sometimes I have a problem with authority? or that I'm an idiot?
For my efforts, the officer wrote me a summons charging me with "curse and abuse."
I did voice my outrage in a downright bone-headed and inappropriate manner, but in court I objected to the use of the word "curse" because—as difficult as it may be for some who know me to believe—I have no such power. No matter how much I may desire to do so, I just don't possess the ability to turn people into pillars of salt, rain frogs upon my enemies, or wither fig trees. I was verbally abusive, but at worst the charge should have read "name-calling." The judge noted my objection and changed the charge to use of "profane language." Of course, this is just as ridiculous as "curse," for we all use profane language everyday. Historically, the word "profane" refers to places, objects, language, et cetera, of the everyday sort. It comes from the Old Latin word
profanus, which literally means, "not consecrated." The alternative to profane language is sacred language: Latin for Christians, Hebrew for Jews, and Arabic for Muslims; none of which I heard in that courtroom. I thought later that if the city is now going to require its citizens to avoid profane language I might as well resign myself now to spending the rest of my life in prison, for I'm versed in neither Latin, nor Hebrew, nor Arabic, nor any other "sacred" language. Nevertheless, the charge stuck, and I was fined $200 and sentenced to 10 days in jail (suspended).
Interestingly, on the editorial page of that morning's paper as I was preparing for court, (the late) Tony Snow had voiced his concern that our traditional freedoms were being curtailed by pointing out that many people since Clinton took office had been "dragged before the magistrates during this presidency merely for shouting bad names at the commander in chief."
And they wondered why I said Virginia is becoming a police state.