Quote:
Originally Posted by Wetdogeared
Painting the Porch
A student, wanting to earn some extra money ...
...
'And by the way, ' the student added, 'it's not a Porch, it's a Lexus.'
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I am so sorry that I offered up warmed up leftovers. That's that I get for not reading all the pages. I shall pay my fine with another fine joke... if I can fin(d) one. Either that or I'm fin.
OblJoke:
I remember when I used to play golf. I was new and basically got the grunt work handed to me. the older fellows were all (much) older, and I have to admit, I looked up to them. Two guys were managers at a bank, and the last guy was the bank president. I got included in their group quite by accident, having caddied for them a year before.
All the hard work, I did. One time, Normam, one of the managers was feeling kind of poorly. They tried to talk him in to letting me sub for him, and meeting them at the bar, but he was in it for money. Around the fifth hole, he started having chest pains, and just after teeing up, he keeled over with a heart Attack! The rest of the game was horrible! Shoot a hole, drag Normal... shoot a hole, drag Norman... He still finished 2 under par, and we send most of the money to his widow (less the bar tab).
That was a hard year, but I learned a lot about golf by caddying -- the people who play it, golf mechanics, rules, etiquette. Yes, etiguette. IT's more than just yelling "FORE". Bob, the bank manager, was a very elegant man. He always dressed the best, spoke the best, had the best equipment, etc. When he was around, HE was the guy I wanted to emulate. He just knew how to BEHAVE that made people take notice.
I remember the last game I caddied for them just before my final year in college. Norman was there, in his wheel chair, Bob was there looking pristine in his golfing outfit, freshly pressed pants, crisp shirt, dashing hat, the whole nine-yards. They had just played the first 14 holes and their course was near a road. I saw Bob do one of the most thoughtful and respectful things I had ever seen. He was teeing up, measuring the ball, on his back swing, when out of the corner of his eye, he noticed a motorcade go by. I don't know why they would go past a public course, but still... all those cars, (popular person), driving slowly, with all their lights, police escort front and back... Well, he sees the motorcade, and scans it quick to locate the herse, stands to attention, and reverently removed his cap and placed it over his heart. I was in awe. "That wasa an awefully nice thing to so, Mr. Bob," I gushed. He stood at reverent attention until the procession was fully finished, and then teed up again. As he measured his shot, he said, "Well, I thought it would be nice... I was married to her for 16 years. FORE!"