Right I've finally sorted out why my reader wasn't working with ADE and the Sony Reader software.
In the MAC you can choose to boot into 64bit mode or 32bit mode, I had changed to using 64bit. (In fact ADE refuses to install if you boot in 64bit mode.)
If, however you had already installed ADE in 32bit mode prior to changing to 64 bit (ie me), ADE and Sony Reader software appear to work but don't detect the reader. Rebooting in 32bit mode and it all works again.
Meanwhile, I have flashed, installed etc etc so now although I am in the UK I've got my reader flashed with the US firmware. (I've lost my UK version somewhere, I thought I'd got it backed up but oh no...). If any nice person has a UK image I can reflash I'd appreciate a PM (V 1.2)