[LazyScot]

Algernon reached the bottom of the stairs. Leading forward was a white corridor, off each side were four doors. After walking to the end of the corridor, Algernon opened the final door on the right, and surveyed the room he had entered. The room was about eight meters square, the walls directly in front and to the left of him were covered by giant white fan-fold shutters, clearly motorised. Throughout the room were assorted benches, in white. The first on the right was covered by a huge pile of dirty washing reaching all the way down to the floor, the others in more normal looking scientific equipment of indeterminate, but probably not philanthropic, purpose. On the right-hand wall, were three large fume cupboards.

"Professor Herr Nachdenken?" asked Algernon to the apparently empty room. The huge pile not so much uncrumpled and stood up as re-crumple and reshaped itself, turning towards Algernon. The resultant reshaped bundle of washing could, with a stretch of imagination be interpreted as a man wearing a lab coat. This lab coat was, it can safely be said, very unique. It had vast numbers of pockets, that appeared to have been stuffed full of unidentifiable bulges. The coat itself was covered in about seventeen lunches, nine dinners, innumerable breakfasts and one small ecosystem. Professor Herr Nachdenken himself was equipped with three chins, six pairs of glasses (covered in varying layers of dust) and haircut suffering multiple identity crises.

"Ah, Algernon. It goes well," he replied in the most perfect received pronunciation.

"The tests?"

"We have one final formula to test out. The current best lasts for at least nine months, and is permanent in about five percent of the population. Here, let me show you," and with that he went to a fume cupboard and took out a tiny, cheap, plastic tat in the shape of a tiny toy car.

"Is that safe?" asked Algernon, somewhat nervously.

"Hmmm?" said Algernon wandering over to a control panel by the shutters. "Oh. It's perfectly safe. Only triggered by laughter." He pressed various buttons and the lights dimmed and the shutters on the left folded back revealing a presumably two-way mirror into a room set out like a lounge. Sitting in the middle lounging on the sofa, happily idling away the time, giggling at some book, was the test subject. Professor Herr Nachdenken placed the plastic car into a rotating canister and rotated it into the test room. A few seconds later, the subject laughed and a small puff of smoke was released.

The test subject sniffed the air briefly frowned, and his expression changed and slowly went blank. He placed his book down on the table, stood up, and walked over to a table where a computer was set out. He promptly took out various piles of paper, and started up various programs. As near as any viewer could determine, the subject was doing accounts.

"Excellent," said Algernon.

"And they are immune to the normal infection vectors as well," said Professor Herr Nachdenken, as he pressed another button. With that, the TV in the test room turned on and started playing the "llama llama duck" video. The subject looked up, stood up and moved, almost zombie like, over to the TV and turned it off, before returning to the desk and accounts.

"I am extremely hopeful that next formula will have a minimum duration of thirty-six months and achieve permanency in about 65% of the population. I'm also attempting to reverse engineer that infectious video meme and suspect we may have some positive results to show you in a few days."

"Wonderful. Have you had any success with Smythe-Bottom?"

"Sadly, no." The professor closed the first shutters and opened the second. In this, Smythe-Bottom was sitting reading from a liseuse, laughing almost continuously. "Despite our best attempts, we have not managed to cure him. If anything he appears to be deteriorating. For instance he now seems addicted to the most inane stories. He is currently enthralled by a series call "The Hugo and Lefty Adventures"; I believe the current one is called Hugo and Lefty and the Missing Hobnob, and he recently finished one entitled Mitten Hari and the Purl Plan: A Hugo and Lefty Adventure. Worryingly, he also seems immune to our current formula."

"Hmmm. Will you still be ready on schedule?"

"If the tests progress as planned, yes."

"Then transfer the formula to the production facility as soon as you have the test results." And with that Algernon left.