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mvisconte · 12-21-2009, 07:01 AM

This blonde (good looking one, too! -- who'da thot) was down on her luck, and in need. She decided to stoop to extreme measures to raise some money quickly.

She studied the nicer part of town, and found an elegant mansion, owned by a well-to-do older gentleman.

She rang his door bell and decided to lay it all on the line.

"Hi. You're a man, and I'm a woman. I'm gorgeous and you've got money. You have something I need, and I have something that I am hoping your want. I'm willing to trade my services to affect a standard captialist transaction involving the exchange of money for selective, scarce, in demand, personal services."

He poured them drinks.
"What exactly did you have in mind, young lady?"

"Well, I am not un-comely. I am buxom and toothsome and most pulchritudinous. I am curvatious and statuesque. I am both soft and firm, and in the correct places according to several popular amateur references on female anatomy. I am young and athletic. I am enthusiastic and even eager to please. I can be a fast worker, or, if you prefer more artistic endeavors, I can pace myself in a way that would enhance any of the services that I can perform."

He refilled drinks.
"I see, that's very descriptive -- yet without saying a thing. But, what do you DO young lady?"

The blonde was in a fit of pique and drew herself up to her full height. She took a deep breath, and jutted out her breasts against her tunic to great advantage. She straightened her back, drew her chin up an full inch higher than normal, allowing her to "look down" her nose at him. She decided to get this over with quickly, and find a more hospitable and rewarding position under some younger, richer, less snotty, and hopefully Viagra-independent man.

"Old man, I will do anything you want.... Any ONE Thing You Want Me To Do for ... well, for $800 -- if you can state it in three words."

"Ah. You are a woman of the night! A woman of easy virtue. A hired-hand, -mouth, -genitals, feet, every-other-body-part. You're a meretrīx. A courtesan. A woman of temporary acquaintance. I know all about your type."

"Well, then you know the deal." She looked left and right, conspiratorially, and then back tho him. "I will do anything you want . . . . ANYTHINNNG you WANT for $800 -- provided it can be stated in three words."

"You're older, you've seen lots of things, experienced some things, heard about other things... well, now is your chance to bring something exhotic to fruition, old son!"

The man regarded her for a moment. His eyes dark brown, stone cold, calculation. He did not allow his eyes to follow the rise and fall of her cleavage. He did not mentally lick her lips with his eyes. He did not visually pop one button at a time from her top. He did not glue his eyes onto her buttocks.

He freshened the drinks. He focused back on her face now.
"$800?" "yes"
"one thing?" "Yes"
"jus' three words" "Uhnhuh".
"you're ... experienced?" "ohhh yeah..."

The man poured himself another drink and finished it quickly. He cast about the house, looking out windows, to the distance. He looked at the chairs and sofas and imagined ice cream. He thought about a shower.

The girl smiled languidly and waited.

"Alright!" he said, "I accept!"

She leaned in to him, bent down slightly to ensure an unencumbered view of her cup-constrained cleavage. She brought here nose within an inch of his and smiled. "So," she purred, "What would you like?"

The man looked deep into her blue eyes and smiled shyly and said
"Paint my porch. "

"What?" -- she smiled a slightly confused smile. Was this some code phrase? Some euphamism for some act so heinous that it was cheap at $800?

"Paint my porch. It's been yearsh since it's been painted. I've been planning to have it done, jush never got around to it. There's paint ina garage, should only take a day or two."

It didn't take as long as she had anticipated. She when thought about how it turned out, she got a warm feeling. You know, when a body sets its mind to something... strange color tho'. It went with the house alright, but why would you want that?

He met her at the door. He was a little more sober now, and wondering about his decision. She looked excited and happy. She looked cute, covered in paint. She'd only just started and yet she had that look like she was expecting something. Eight hundred dollars of something... Time to stall a bit. "Yes? Is there something you need?"

"I'm done! I went ahead and did two coats. It was easy! But mister, that's a BMW, not a Porsche."

12-21-2009, 07:01 AM	#631
mvisconte pHilosopher kIng Posts: 208 Karma: 429751 Join Date: Jul 2009 Location: An imperfect world Device: Laptop, laptop, desktop, phone (HTC, HTC, Asus, Asus, LG rah!)	This blonde (good looking one, too! -- who'da thot) was down on her luck, and in need. She decided to stoop to extreme measures to raise some money quickly. She studied the nicer part of town, and found an elegant mansion, owned by a well-to-do older gentleman. She rang his door bell and decided to lay it all on the line. "Hi. You're a man, and I'm a woman. I'm gorgeous and you've got money. You have something I need, and I have something that I am hoping your want. I'm willing to trade my services to affect a standard captialist transaction involving the exchange of money for selective, scarce, in demand, personal services." He poured them drinks. "What exactly did you have in mind, young lady?" "Well, I am not un-comely. I am buxom and toothsome and most pulchritudinous. I am curvatious and statuesque. I am both soft and firm, and in the correct places according to several popular amateur references on female anatomy. I am young and athletic. I am enthusiastic and even eager to please. I can be a fast worker, or, if you prefer more artistic endeavors, I can pace myself in a way that would enhance any of the services that I can perform." He refilled drinks. "I see, that's very descriptive -- yet without saying a thing. But, what do you DO young lady?" The blonde was in a fit of pique and drew herself up to her full height. She took a deep breath, and jutted out her breasts against her tunic to great advantage. She straightened her back, drew her chin up an full inch higher than normal, allowing her to "look down" her nose at him. She decided to get this over with quickly, and find a more hospitable and rewarding position under some younger, richer, less snotty, and hopefully Viagra-independent man. "Old man, I will do anything you want.... Any ONE Thing You Want Me To Do for ... well, for $800 -- if you can state it in three words." "Ah. You are a woman of the night! A woman of easy virtue. A hired-hand, -mouth, -genitals, feet, every-other-body-part. You're a meretrīx. A courtesan. A woman of temporary acquaintance. I know all about your type." "Well, then you know the deal." She looked left and right, conspiratorially, and then back tho him. "I will do anything you want . . . . ANYTHINNNG you WANT for $800 -- provided it can be stated in three words." "You're older, you've seen lots of things, experienced some things, heard about other things... well, now is your chance to bring something exhotic to fruition, old son!" The man regarded her for a moment. His eyes dark brown, stone cold, calculation. He did not allow his eyes to follow the rise and fall of her cleavage. He did not mentally lick her lips with his eyes. He did not visually pop one button at a time from her top. He did not glue his eyes onto her buttocks. He freshened the drinks. He focused back on her face now. "$800?" "yes" "one thing?" "Yes" "jus' three words" "Uhnhuh". "you're ... experienced?" "ohhh yeah..." The man poured himself another drink and finished it quickly. He cast about the house, looking out windows, to the distance. He looked at the chairs and sofas and imagined ice cream. He thought about a shower. The girl smiled languidly and waited. "Alright!" he said, "I accept!" She leaned in to him, bent down slightly to ensure an unencumbered view of her cup-constrained cleavage. She brought here nose within an inch of his and smiled. "So," she purred, "What would you like?" The man looked deep into her blue eyes and smiled shyly and said "Paint my porch. " "What?" -- she smiled a slightly confused smile. Was this some code phrase? Some euphamism for some act so heinous that it was cheap at $800? "Paint my porch. It's been yearsh since it's been painted. I've been planning to have it done, jush never got around to it. There's paint ina garage, should only take a day or two." It didn't take as long as she had anticipated. She when thought about how it turned out, she got a warm feeling. You know, when a body sets its mind to something... strange color tho'. It went with the house alright, but why would you want that? He met her at the door. He was a little more sober now, and wondering about his decision. She looked excited and happy. She looked cute, covered in paint. She'd only just started and yet she had that look like she was expecting something. Eight hundred dollars of something... Time to stall a bit. "Yes? Is there something you need?" "I'm done! I went ahead and did two coats. It was easy! But mister, that's a BMW, not a Porsche."