[Greg Anos]

A couple of hours later we got another

thump. It consisted of another note,

thanking me for the food and telling

me that I would get a few hour off

from the flames for my kindness. it

also included a phone number.

Hallelujah!

I gave it a dial. A loud voice answered

at the other end.

"Temple of God Annex. May the Lord

come into your life."

"This is Red. Can I talk with Micah?"

"He's busy at the moment, trying to

lead a poor, misguided believer to

the Light."

Well, in war there are casualties. I

figgered the tele-evangelist deserved

what he was receiving. At least I didn't

have to listen. Yet.

"Well, when the Lord grants him a

moment of respite, could you have

him call me back at my number?"

"Let me get a piece of paper."

I waited. The voice at the other

end came back and I left my number.

"And, by the way, could you take a

message? Do any of your

unenlightened guests need any

medicines? I wouldn't want any of

them to go to Judgement before

you've had a chance to Save them."

The person at the other end

thought that was being quite

neighborly and would pass it on

as soon as Micah came up for air.

I hung up and went to see the

Hoover doll.

"Do we have a list of medical conditions

and maintence medications needed

by the hostages? I'd like to get all

the needed medications on hand

before they call back."

The Hoover doll scurried off. Nothing to

do now but wait.



An hour later my phone rang.

"Red speakin'. "

"This is Micah. Thanks for the

Bar-be-que. The dog seemed to be

very pleased with the bacon. I don't

know why."

"Just trying to do my Christian duty.

Speakin' of duties. Did you get my

message about medicines?"

"Yes. I'll send the list back by

trebuchet so you'll have a hard

copy."

"Can you send the tele-evangelist

back with the cart? That way we

can use him as a go-between for

more food and meds. You'll get

some more innings with him later."

"Certainly. He is misguided, but I

expect to lead him to the light

eventually."

I personally figgered the only light

he wanted to led to was the one

behind a mistress while she was

wearin' some translucent nighty,

but I kept my mouth shut.

"Fine, I expect he'll look forward to

that. Now, if you don't mind,

Micah, I'd like to slip in a little

business. Do you mind tellin' me

why did you decide to Witness

to a bunch of heathen diplomats."

"Red, in a world filled with war,

hate, and evil, we need

ministers to go forth among

nations to speak the Truth

to the misguided and heathen.

The decision was made among

us that it would be better to

show the Light to professional

ministers, who were knowledgeable

in the ways of persuasion, that to try to

train the Enlighted in the ways of the

unwashed world."

Yep, if it worked, you'd get a lower

defection rate. Lower than 99%, anyway.

"Sounds like a hard but viable plan."

"The progress has been very slow. None

of the diplomats seem inclined to

walk the path to Righteousness, no

matter how we try to engage them.

Even the dog seems to delight in

being obstinate."

"How does a dog manage to do that?"

"You think he'd could understand the

spoken language. Impossible, of

course, for a dog. He has done

unspeakable acts to my shoes,

while I've been engaged in

Witnessing the Gospel to the

massed ministers. Why an

unhousebroken dog was in a

meeting of ambassadors, I

will never understand."

"Maybe they wanted to have

something to sneer at. You

know how arrogant the

ambassadors are. I'll bet some

of them have told you that

you could find the floor with

your hat."

"They were far less polite than that,

Red. Still, such abuses are part

of the Calling, one learns to ignore

the insult of the unwashed as

they are led to the Light."

"Well, let's leave it at that. Oh,

before I hang up, what and

when would you like some more

food? That way I can have it

ready when you need it."

"I think fish would be nice. Around 6 PM

should be fine."

"That sounds appropriate for a fisher

of souls, such as yourself. I'll

get a bunch from Sea Island.

If you send to tele-evangelist

back now, and pitch the medicine

list as well, we'll be good to go.

I'll give you a ring when dinner

is ready to be shipped across."

"You're been a good go-between, so

far, for a heathen. We'll wait for

you call around 6."

"Fine, talk to you then."

A couple of minutes later I heard a

thump in the yard, and saw the

tele-evangelist wheeling the

now-empty cart back.

I turned to the Hoover doll.

"Looks like it's going better than

I thought."

"It doesn't look like it's going at

all." he muttered.

"Nonsense, there's been no talk of

hostage executions, or other nasty

treatments. We've got a real

thoughtful bunch of kidnappers here.

I hope they just stay stupid. And I

hope VR will stop peeing on their

shoes. That's liable to get him shot.

Or a long, looong bath...."