MobileRead Forums - View Single Post

vivaldirules · 11-01-2009, 08:45 AM

"It was a stark and musty sight.

This opening line, while presenting a rather uncertain image at first, actually says a great deal. First, it says that the author has difficulties composing phrases or even thoughts containing more than about two words in a row. Well, that's true enough. Second, it says that this particular sight, being a vision described by the author and intended for the reader to attempt to see, is both stark (i.e., sheer or nekkid - teehee!) and musty (having a stale odor - how does a sight have an odor??). So what sort of sight might that be? Well, how about another "home" video starring Paris Hilton? No? Okay, then imagine this: a small, nearly hairless dog emerges from his slumber amid a pile of several other wet and muddy dogs. The protaganist (yes, that's him) slowly stretches and then shakes violently, filling the air with that delectable odor of wet dog. You see, it is possible to describe a scene this way. It took a bit of explanation, I'll grant you, but it is plausible. Still, it in no way does justice to this particular tail....erm, tale. So let's get on with it, shall we?"

Let's see, 200 words down and another 49,800 to go. Okay, maybe not.

11-01-2009, 08:45 AM	#69
vivaldirules When's Doughnut Day? Posts: 10,059 Karma: 13675475 Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Houston, TX, US Device: Sony PRS-505, iPad	"It was a stark and musty sight. This opening line, while presenting a rather uncertain image at first, actually says a great deal. First, it says that the author has difficulties composing phrases or even thoughts containing more than about two words in a row. Well, that's true enough. Second, it says that this particular sight, being a vision described by the author and intended for the reader to attempt to see, is both stark (i.e., sheer or nekkid - teehee!) and musty (having a stale odor - how does a sight have an odor??). So what sort of sight might that be? Well, how about another "home" video starring Paris Hilton? No? Okay, then imagine this: a small, nearly hairless dog emerges from his slumber amid a pile of several other wet and muddy dogs. The protaganist (yes, that's him) slowly stretches and then shakes violently, filling the air with that delectable odor of wet dog. You see, it is possible to describe a scene this way. It took a bit of explanation, I'll grant you, but it is plausible. Still, it in no way does justice to this particular tail....erm, tale. So let's get on with it, shall we?" Let's see, 200 words down and another 49,800 to go. Okay, maybe not.