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I just saw this coming over the wire:
NEWS FLASH! STOP PARIS STOP ANTIQUE TREASURE STOLEN! STOP THE OWNER OF A PARIS CAFE (ADD YOUR OWN DAMN ACCENTS) REPORTED THE DISAPPEARANCE OF A HUMONGOUS AND ANCIENT UMBRELLA LAST NIGHT STOP THE ENORMOUS CONTRAPTION MADE FROM OAK WAS RUMORED TO HAVE BEEN USED TO PROTECT THE EQUALLY ENORMOUS TROJAN RABBIT FROM REIGNING CATTLE AND HALE! (OR WAS THAT RAINING CATTLE AND HAIL?) STOP (C.F., "MONTY PYTHON AND THE HOLY GRAIL") STOP ANYWAY LIKE I WAS SAYING THIS THING WAS HUGE WITH ENORMOUS....WELL....LOOK AT THE BONES!!! STOP CAFE OWNER SLIGHTLY DERANGED AND NEEDS A DAY OFF STOP THE OWNER SAYS THAT HE ACQUIRED THE OBJECT FROM A LITTLE OLD LADY SELLING LISEUSEUSEUSEUSES (I CAN NEVER SAY THAT WORD) AND HAS BEEN USING IT TO PROP OPEN THE CAFE DOOR AND OCCASIONALLY BLUDGEON RANDOM SHUMS STOP I REALLY LIKE USING STOP STOP DON'T YOU? STOP ANYWAYS LIKES I WAS SAYING THE CAFE OWNER REPORTS THAT A SPRY YOUNG MAIDEN WAS SEEN FLIRTING WITH THESE LIKE FOUR GUYS LIKE JUST BEFORE THE OBJECT WAS LIKE NOTICED MISSING STOP STOP STOP STOP MAN I LIKE THAT STOP THING STOP OH CRAP STOP HERE COMES MY COPY EDITOR STOP NO! STOP STOP! STOP STOP I SAY STOP THIS IS MY STORY! STOP
OUR APOLOGIES STOP THE PERSONS WHO WERE RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS WIRE HAVE BEEN SACKED STOP HAVE A NICE DAY STOP SAY THAT STOP THING REALLY IS KINDA COOL ISN'T IT? STOP STOP STOP STOP OH CRAP! STOP HERE COMES THE BIG GUY! STOP STOP! STOP STOP! STOP STOP! STOP STOP! STOP
OUR APOLOGIES STOP THE PERSONS WHO WERE RESPONSIBLE FOR SACKING THOSE WHO WERE RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS WIRE HAVE BEEN SACKED STOP SAY WHAT DOES THIS BUTTON D
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