Receptionist: Doctor! Doctor! There's a tightrope walker on the phone.
Doctor: Tell him I'm on another line.
Patient: Doctor! Doctor! One of my feet is 3 times bigger than the other.
Doctor: That's not a foot. That's a yard!
Receptionist: Doctor! Doctor! There's a ghost in the waiting room.
Doctor: Yes, I know. He has a boo-boo.
Receptionist: Doctor! Doctor! There's a lady in the waiting room putting lipstick on her head?
Doctor: Hmmm... Sounds like she's trying to make up her mind.
Patient: Doctor! Doctor! People tell me I'm not too bright.
Doctor: Hold on a minute while I turn on a light.
This one's for pshrynk...
Patient: Doctor! Doctor! I dreamed that I was an acorn and a pecan!
Doctor: You must be nuts.
