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Q: How can you tell when a musician is really stupid?
A: When the other musicians notice.
Q: What's the inscription on dead blues-singer's tombstones?
A: "I didn't wake up this morning..."
Q: How many lead guitarists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. Get the drummer to do it.
Opera is when a guy gets stabbed in the back and, instead of bleeding, he sings.
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So this trumpet player dies. When he reaches is everlasting reward, the guy in the robe says, "You're going to spend eternity with this combo, okay? There's a bass player named 'Mingus' and a pianist named 'Monk', and any day now we expect this 'Blakey' guy to show up with his drums."
"Wow!" the guy says, "I never imagined heaven would be this good."
The man in the robe says, "This is hell, not heaven. There's a woman singer."
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