Posted on Craig's List:
SVP of Douchebag
Reply to:
job-402984315@craigslist.org
Date: 2007-08-21, 11:46PM
Job Title
Sr VP of Douchebag
Key Skills
Whining, Credit-taking, project under/over estimation
The SR VP of Douchebag will be responsible for developing and maintaining our consumer focused website and services, rapidly and unnecessarily taking credit for the development of integrations with partner websites and services, and generally setting impossible expectations for 3rd party application plugins.
The ideal candidate possesses an MBA, is inflexible, and completely full of shit; able to delegate specific tasks on their own from their perceived business and product goals. Primary work will be focused on development of the web site using APIs and Web Services to connect to and use application data. Knowledge of the definition of API and/or website is not required.
Secondary work will be designing, developing, and scaling a fully functional RSS feature. Reading of blogs is desired, but qualified applicants will be considered.
Responsibilities:
• Taking credit for your team implementing your impossible deliverables
• Dining with Exec management on a weekly basis
• PowerPoint presentations for the board (to be formatted by interns)
• Knowledge of the existence of the internet
• Understanding and using spellcheck on various applications
• Delegation of any task put forth to you and not mentioned as a skill above
Technical Skills:
• Computer
• Email
• Telephone
• Motor Vehicle Operation
Compensation: Depends on namedropping
Principals only. Recruiters, please don't contact this job poster.
Please, no phone calls about this job!
Please do not contact job poster about other services, products or commercial interests.
Original URL:
http://sfbay.craigslist.org/sfc/eng/402984315.html