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More suggestions
Some of my favourites have already been mentioned:
Vorkosigan series by Lois McMaster Bujold (humourous Sci-Fi, best for romance is "A civil campaign", but should prob read "Komarr" before that - available at webscriptions.net).
The Kushiel books by Jaqueline Carey (however, these are not for you if you have problems with alternative lifestyles)
Ruby dynasty books by Catherine Asaro
These ones haven't been mentioned before:
Shola books by Lisanne Norman (if you have problems with anything besides hetero 2 people in a relationship you might not like these).
Honor Harrington by David Webber (not that much romance, but one of the strongest and best characterised female leads I've seen, pretty hard Sci-Fi with lots of battles, so might not be what you're looking for).
Sunrunner books by Melanie Rawn (really fantasy, but if you liked Tolkien you'll like these).
I'm sure I'll come up with more when I have time.
Hope that helps.
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