It sometimes feels like people take the "gritty realism" of GRR Martin or Joe Abercrombie or Steven Erikson and say "adult books need to have these elements" when really they don't. That's a style choice by the author.
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Originally Posted by Gandulf
I offer a challenge, name a fantasy series that comes close to this. Malazan book of the fallen come close and please don't name WOT, it's a children's book compared.
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Brandon Sanderson's Cosmere should be in that discussion. It's not done yet (and won't be for a while) but his world, or universe really, has the scope and complexity. It's not "adult" in that he doesn't have the graphic sex and violence but it's not children's literature either; especially the Stormlight Archive.