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CWatkinsNash · 03-11-2020, 01:32 AM

I'm finally back in front of my computer after 8 days of fear, cold nights, and sharing a 20-amp generator with our next-door neighbors, who are the only other household on our block besides us able to stay in their houses after a tornado destroyed most of the homes in my immediate area.

I'm posting this vent here so that I don't do something stupid like posting it on social media. I don't even use social media but I was considering making an exception. This is something that's been nagging at me since some incidents this past Saturday and I just need to get it off my chest. I know I'm being irrational and unfair but I don't care. I need to say it anyway. There might be some mildly colorful language.

---------------------------------
Hey, you. Yeah, you with the phone and otherwise empty hands. Yes, YOU. I just heard you tell someone you're from Antioch. You're not here to help. You're here to gawk and then get useless social media sympathy points by posting a photo of MY neighborhood, or what's left of it, with your stupid hashtags, implying that this disaster had anything to do with you at all. I know because I saw you take the pics and heard you talking about it to your friend there. (Your friend at least had the grace to look uncomfortable.) Normally, I'd be more tolerant, but unlike the last round of looky-loos who at least offered compassion, you're not even trying. You tromped through my yard, you didn't even say "hi" or ask if we were okay as I stood there in my fuzzy bathrobe because I was cold and hadn't truly felt warm since I climbed back out of the basement at 1:55 am last Tuesday morning.

Maybe you looked at my house and realized we just had some broken windows. Maybe it didn't occur to you that there are a lot of other things you can lose in a tornado. Like your sense of security, your sanity, your ability to sleep at night. Neighbors that I won't see for months because, you know, THEIR HOUSES ARE GONE. You might have thought that since i was standing there, it couldn't have been that bad, right? In a sense, yes. We still had a house, unlike many others, and for that I am both grateful and astounded. But we didn't stay because the house was comfortable - because it wasn't. No heat is rough when you are missing some windows and the temps drop below freezing. We stayed because I couldn't leave. Because every minute of every day since that damned thing blew through here, I've had this horrible dread that if I turned my back, it would all be gone too. And dammit, this is home and I'm not leaving unless I have to. That probably makes me an idiot but I don't care. So we stayed, me and my roommate. We were able to stay and get by because of the endless, amazing volunteers that showed up to help my neighborhood. And the neighbors' generator, obviously, which helped us not lose all of our food in the fridge and let us make hot coffee in the mornings. (I think they stayed in their place for similar reasons and also because they have 4 dogs. The four of us all sort of held each other up through this.)

The volunteers gave us sleeping bags, food, water, toilet paper, anything we might possibly need, they managed to make it appear.

You? You gave me a pain in the ass that's been festering for days.

I mean, if you had asked how I was, I probably would have just said that I'm doing okay, holding up and all that crap, but we'll never know because you didn't ask.

And then. AND THEN. I saw you walk back by a little later, probably back toward the police checkpoint to go back to your cozy electrified domicile, and you did the thing that really pissed me off. You took a hot dog from the people who were handing them out in front of my house. They had asked me if they could set up there because I had cleared my curb the previous day after the debris trucks cleared the big stuff, and I said yes because that was a wonderful idea and it was out of the way of active work going on. They were lovely. They set up a grill and made food for the victims and volunteers and the police officers working 12 hour shifts. Get this - their area got hit too, but they came over here to help us! And YOU took a hot dog!! That wasn't for you!! What the hell is wrong with you?? It's not a street fair, you jackass!

I thought about hitting twitter to see if I could find you but I'm just too damned tired to bother. You suck. DO BETTER. Just freakin' do better.

But hey, who knows? Maybe me being fixated on your nonsense helped distract me on the last few days of what felt like the apocalypse.

------------------------

Thanks for tolerating that, guys. It got waaay longer than I intended because once I got going... Well, you know. LOL Anyway, I really do feel a LOT better after getting that out of my system. And now I'm going to crawl into my bed, which is actually warm for the first time in over a week. Yay!

03-11-2020, 01:32 AM	#33537
CWatkinsNash IOC Chief Archivist Posts: 3,950 Karma: 53868218 Join Date: Dec 2010 Location: Fruitland Park, FL, USA Device: Meebook M7, Paperwhite 2021, Fire HD 8+, Fire HD 10+, Lenovo Tab P12	I'm finally back in front of my computer after 8 days of fear, cold nights, and sharing a 20-amp generator with our next-door neighbors, who are the only other household on our block besides us able to stay in their houses after a tornado destroyed most of the homes in my immediate area. I'm posting this vent here so that I don't do something stupid like posting it on social media. I don't even use social media but I was considering making an exception. This is something that's been nagging at me since some incidents this past Saturday and I just need to get it off my chest. I know I'm being irrational and unfair but I don't care. I need to say it anyway. There might be some mildly colorful language. --------------------------------- Hey, you. Yeah, you with the phone and otherwise empty hands. Yes, YOU. I just heard you tell someone you're from Antioch. You're not here to help. You're here to gawk and then get useless social media sympathy points by posting a photo of MY neighborhood, or what's left of it, with your stupid hashtags, implying that this disaster had anything to do with you at all. I know because I saw you take the pics and heard you talking about it to your friend there. (Your friend at least had the grace to look uncomfortable.) Normally, I'd be more tolerant, but unlike the last round of looky-loos who at least offered compassion, you're not even trying. You tromped through my yard, you didn't even say "hi" or ask if we were okay as I stood there in my fuzzy bathrobe because I was cold and hadn't truly felt warm since I climbed back out of the basement at 1:55 am last Tuesday morning. Maybe you looked at my house and realized we just had some broken windows. Maybe it didn't occur to you that there are a lot of other things you can lose in a tornado. Like your sense of security, your sanity, your ability to sleep at night. Neighbors that I won't see for months because, you know, THEIR HOUSES ARE GONE. You might have thought that since i was standing there, it couldn't have been that bad, right? In a sense, yes. We still had a house, unlike many others, and for that I am both grateful and astounded. But we didn't stay because the house was comfortable - because it wasn't. No heat is rough when you are missing some windows and the temps drop below freezing. We stayed because I couldn't leave. Because every minute of every day since that damned thing blew through here, I've had this horrible dread that if I turned my back, it would all be gone too. And dammit, this is home and I'm not leaving unless I have to. That probably makes me an idiot but I don't care. So we stayed, me and my roommate. We were able to stay and get by because of the endless, amazing volunteers that showed up to help my neighborhood. And the neighbors' generator, obviously, which helped us not lose all of our food in the fridge and let us make hot coffee in the mornings. (I think they stayed in their place for similar reasons and also because they have 4 dogs. The four of us all sort of held each other up through this.) The volunteers gave us sleeping bags, food, water, toilet paper, anything we might possibly need, they managed to make it appear. You? You gave me a pain in the ass that's been festering for days. I mean, if you had asked how I was, I probably would have just said that I'm doing okay, holding up and all that crap, but we'll never know because you didn't ask. And then. AND THEN. I saw you walk back by a little later, probably back toward the police checkpoint to go back to your cozy electrified domicile, and you did the thing that really pissed me off. You took a hot dog from the people who were handing them out in front of my house. They had asked me if they could set up there because I had cleared my curb the previous day after the debris trucks cleared the big stuff, and I said yes because that was a wonderful idea and it was out of the way of active work going on. They were lovely. They set up a grill and made food for the victims and volunteers and the police officers working 12 hour shifts. Get this - their area got hit too, but they came over here to help us! And YOU took a hot dog!! That wasn't for you!! What the hell is wrong with you?? It's not a street fair, you jackass! I thought about hitting twitter to see if I could find you but I'm just too damned tired to bother. You suck. DO BETTER. Just freakin' do better. But hey, who knows? Maybe me being fixated on your nonsense helped distract me on the last few days of what felt like the apocalypse. ------------------------ Thanks for tolerating that, guys. It got waaay longer than I intended because once I got going... Well, you know. LOL Anyway, I really do feel a LOT better after getting that out of my system. And now I'm going to crawl into my bed, which is actually warm for the first time in over a week. Yay!