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Old 02-22-2020, 02:49 PM   #113
pwalker8
Grand Sorcerer
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DuckieTigger View Post
(Two posts combined)

The original topic of this thread is Black History Month. In a nutshell, as I understand, it is to raise awareness of why our society as a whole needs to change their attitudes towards less racial injustice. A crime fighting effort, not an effort that will teach the minorities to just deal with it by avoiding crime.

Your efforts of teaching to avoid crime are noble and useful. I have not claimed otherwise. It can even work for both, potential victims and potential criminals. Positive reinforcement to show that there is a place, your dojo, that has no tolerance for bullying. The one offence I take is that you appear to suggest victims should come to your dojo to avoid becoming a victim again. That should always be a discretionary decision of the psychologist, psychiatrist or councilor.

Once you have been a victim, the emotional scars will never ever go away completely. There will always be that little voice in your head that will ask "What did I do wrong to deserve this?" For me personally, the thought occured to me to pick up some kind of Martial Arts. Not as a team building effort, but as a way for revenge. A very nasty, violent revenge that always ended up in dead and mutilated attackers. I found other ways to cope, afraid of having the tools in my hands (pun intended) to put the nightmares into reality.

Intellectually I am aware now why I may have been targeted, emotionally I always have doubts of what I could have done different. So no, victims already do enough self victim blaming, no need for an outsider to reinforce such thoughts.
In general, we do not advertise our services as a place where you come to avoid being a victim again. We have younger students whose parents bring them to karate because they are picked on, which is a very different thing. We don't tell parents that we can teach your child not to be picked on. We tell parents that we work on confidence, social skills and becoming a leader. Yes, we work on things like stranger danger and bullying but it's not a primary focus.
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