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Well, this is entirely embarrassing.
Of course I was running the the sqllite3.exe while the device was connected. So no, I never did disconnect it to let it do its "catching up". Once I did that, author and series showed up in the database.
And the size was there all along, but I'd only looked for it immediately after importing.
I don't know what was up with the series/author problem displaying on the kobo, I'd tried disconnecting it, reconnecting a few times, using the kobo utils to update the metadata in the device library, and update the cached metadata in the device. None of this seemed to work. But I noticed I wasn't seeing the brief progress bar immediately after disconnecting the device, that I was used to seeing.
However, I just power-cycled it. Once it came up, everything looked fine on the kobo (in the GUI), the author, the series were all correct. And just to check, I deleted the books and re-uploaded them, and it all worked well. I even see the progress bar again.
So it appears to have been a case of user error on my part, 1. I didn't understand how calibre syncs, and 2. perhaps I also confused the device with all the plugging and unplugging I was doing.
Thank you davidfor!
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