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Uh... okay, this doesn't look like the Mary. It's all grungy and dark, and--
"Who're you?"
Um... who are y--WHOA!
"I asked you a question, y' old coot!"
"Jayne, put him down!"
"But Mal, he just appeared in the middle of--"
"I said, drop him!"
--UMPH! Thanks...
"Sorry about that. Jayne gets a mite peevish around people who just appear out of the nowhere. Can't say as I'm particularly fond of it, either... seein' as how it's my ship, and you didn't pay me to get on..."
Your ship? Wait: You wouldn't happen to be Captain Mal Reynolds, would you?
"And exactly how do you know me?"
"Excuse me, Captain--"
"Relax, Doc, no one's hurt yet, so you go back and mind your sister."
"Captain, I know this man. It's Steve Jordan. He writes science fiction novels."
"Which are what?"
"...Books?"
"Oh. Those."
"Which one? Do you do Green Lantern?"
"Jayne... hold on. I do know you! You're the one who put out that book Berserker, right after we went on the air!"
My head hurts...
"Book with terraformed worlds in it, right? And you said you thought of it first! Kaylee, go get Joss on the phone, I need him to see this guy!"
"Huh?"
"Goh-gu-fish-hing-haw-day, girl, will you stop clinging to the sawbones and get me a phone?"
"Why don't we interrogate him?"
"I wouldn't, boys... I've heard of his agent, Diane, and she'll have us all locked up if you hurt a hair on his head."
Yeah... Diane...
"Well, I guess Inara would know about such things. Lucky for you, Mister funny book writer. You still haven't told me how you got on my gorram ship."
Uh... with this...
"Looks like a key fob."
"Is it a remote control? Careful he doesn't open the cargo bay doors!"
"Shut up, Jayne! What is it?"
It calls up... here, I'll show you, you do this... turn it this way... and press--
"Hey! Wha--"
oooooohhhhhhhhhh...........
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