Gregg:
Following up on BookCat's post, here's my question:
Are you operating under the belief that this opening paragaph:
Quote:
|
“Give up, scumbag?” Lainey Tripper had the thug in a headlock. She hadn’t been in a fight like this in ages and was having fun. The guy’s warm saliva ran down her forearm. He was drooling, choking. “Well, do you!”
|
...is going to convey to the prospective reader that this is a comedy? Or, rather, Black Comedy or dark humor? Do you think that's a humorous or ironic or satiric paragraph that telegraphs that to the reader?
I'm asking because of what you said, that "[you] don't think anybody reading that can mistake the book for anything but the silly romp that it is."
Somehow, I skimmed over that, until I read Bookcat's post, and then I went back and re-read your post.
I'm sorry, and yes, I realize that this thread was supposed to be about the cover, not the book, but
there is really nothing "silly romp-ish" about that opening paragraph. It sounds like an unintentional
badly-written thriller. The saliva does nothing to ameliorate that--it is, in fact, the part that comes off as (unintentionally) badly-written. Not humorous. I realize that it's not easy to say everything you're trying to tell the reader, in a single pair of sentences, but...it's
not there yet.
You either need to make the humor or satire
MUCH broader, to convey that so quickly, or...
something. I mean, Gregg, I'm your target reader. I adore dark comedies. I'm a consumer of Hiaasen (albeit not whats-is-name, whose books I find...over-labored and sort of self-consciously too-too precious.)
Gregg, what does your
own critique group say?
Hitch