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alexjames4u · 08-22-2017, 05:55 PM

Hi Cinisajoy,

Thanks to you, I've now completed the first stage of a revision. The intro is shortened, the 'gist' has been discarded, and the story now more gradually unfolds after rearranging the chapters. Hopefully, the chapters are also more defined in the likes of your Kindle too. Heres a rough draft of a segment from the introduction:

I don’t’ doubt there’ll be issues caused by this work’s piece-meal make-up and by the fact that it was rushed, in the final stages, to meet a deadline with the police, so I apologize. Of the two main versions of this work, the original was more like how this one is now (perhaps even better) with the second version for the police actually summarizing the story at the outset and expanding from there, to facilitate those who had no time to read the full story. But when this police-draft was expanded much further and made into my first actual offering as a book, it was greeted with several criticisms mainly from one critic at a book-discussion forum. Perhaps a bit abrasive, but the fact is that this guy's criticisms were mostly valid, especially one in which he literally ridiculed the concept of summarizing the story at the beginning. He was absolutely right and, though I couldn't incorporate more than two or three of his suggested revisions into this version, so far, I believe the few I've so far been able to implement make this improvised 'book' a much better prospect for those like him who want to be gradually drawn into the story, as against those (like the police) who want the gist at the beginning and the rest tackled at their leisure (if at all).

Many thanks to that helpful critic. It's true I've written a few articles and blogs in my time, but never a book. As a first-time 'author,' there's a lot more for me to learn, but I thank that critic for the kick in the butt which inspired this albeit limited revision, so far. As the saying goes; you can never make a silk purse from a sow's ear. And this book will never be near the best there is, partly because it wasn't originally meant to be a book. But, still, I believe those who'd told me long ago that it (even in its older form) conveys a very interesting story.

Since you showed so much interest, I could send you a copy of the 'Word' document. Or you could check back with amazon in a day or so when the revised version should be up. I still don't like how their system squashes single-spaced paragraphs together (and exaggerates double-space) but I'll tackle that and one or two more issues at some other time.

Thanks again for your help so far Bro.

Cheers.

08-22-2017, 05:55 PM	#12
alexjames4u Member Posts: 20 Karma: 377234 Join Date: Aug 2017 Device: none	Now Revised: TARGETED BY TWO NEIGHBORS FROM HELL Hi Cinisajoy, Thanks to you, I've now completed the first stage of a revision. The intro is shortened, the 'gist' has been discarded, and the story now more gradually unfolds after rearranging the chapters. Hopefully, the chapters are also more defined in the likes of your Kindle too. Heres a rough draft of a segment from the introduction: I don’t’ doubt there’ll be issues caused by this work’s piece-meal make-up and by the fact that it was rushed, in the final stages, to meet a deadline with the police, so I apologize. Of the two main versions of this work, the original was more like how this one is now (perhaps even better) with the second version for the police actually summarizing the story at the outset and expanding from there, to facilitate those who had no time to read the full story. But when this police-draft was expanded much further and made into my first actual offering as a book, it was greeted with several criticisms mainly from one critic at a book-discussion forum. Perhaps a bit abrasive, but the fact is that this guy's criticisms were mostly valid, especially one in which he literally ridiculed the concept of summarizing the story at the beginning. He was absolutely right and, though I couldn't incorporate more than two or three of his suggested revisions into this version, so far, I believe the few I've so far been able to implement make this improvised 'book' a much better prospect for those like him who want to be gradually drawn into the story, as against those (like the police) who want the gist at the beginning and the rest tackled at their leisure (if at all). Many thanks to that helpful critic. It's true I've written a few articles and blogs in my time, but never a book. As a first-time 'author,' there's a lot more for me to learn, but I thank that critic for the kick in the butt which inspired this albeit limited revision, so far. As the saying goes; you can never make a silk purse from a sow's ear. And this book will never be near the best there is, partly because it wasn't originally meant to be a book. But, still, I believe those who'd told me long ago that it (even in its older form) conveys a very interesting story. Since you showed so much interest, I could send you a copy of the 'Word' document. Or you could check back with amazon in a day or so when the revised version should be up. I still don't like how their system squashes single-spaced paragraphs together (and exaggerates double-space) but I'll tackle that and one or two more issues at some other time. Thanks again for your help so far Bro. Cheers.