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Old 05-09-2017, 02:49 PM   #29971
DMcCunney
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bilbo1967 View Post
Rumpelteazer, it sounds like you're just a really nice person who's, possibly, getting a bit of a bad deal from other family members who don't seem as nice. That sucks.
It does indeed.

An old friend is coping with a variant. She's the younger sister in a family of four, with two brothers (whose ages I don't know.) She put her life and career on hold to be elder care for her aged mother, living in the family home and seeing to the various things mom couldn't do herself.

Elder sister was made executrix of the estate and had mom's medical proxy. Elder sister is also one of those folks firmly convinced that she knows better and must be in control, and was unhappy that younger sister was being mom's caregiver. (Never mind that elder sister is married with her own house, and not available to do the job - only to complain about how it's being done.) Elder sister's personality also alienated various other folks like mom's doctors, and some of the things elder sister did arguably shortened mom's life.

So my friend is still living in the family home that might just be sold out from under her, waiting for elder sister to reveal the provisions of mom's will and which way things will settle.

My own take is that she's in a dysfunctional family, and mom made the wrong call by anointing elder sister as executrix of the will and holder of the medical proxy. I'm sympathetic, and won't actually come out and say "You realize that your mom screwed you, despite the fact that you devoted years to caring for her...", but I think it hard whenever we talk.
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Dennis
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