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That seems a hard situation. It's hard to understand how someone can't have lost a pet or a loved one at an age above 20 or so. My niece is 5 years old now, and in that time she's lost two dogs (that were 14 and 15 at the point of their passing; the 14 year old just died during the night, the 15 year old was put to sleep), and a great-grandfather.
Can't you go to the vet together, ask him what can and should be done, and have him state that it would be the best to put the cat to sleep because otherwise she will suffer without any chance of getting better? Maybe he'll accept it from the vet, even if he doesn't from you.
Good luck with that.
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