Quote:
Originally Posted by Cinisajoy
Find books on what he likes to read in magazines.
If it is something he doesn't like, he will never read.
Now, I am going to play Devil's advocate.
Does your husband want to read books?
Is he an adult?
Does he hold a job?
Does he have any hobbies that you don't do?
Here is the thing. If he doesn't want to read, don't push him. He is not a child that must do homework.
He is an adult with his own mind.
But if it is that important to you to have a husband that reads book, do the guy you are married to a favor and leave him now.
You knew he didn't read when you married him, so why should he read now?
You push too hard and all it will do is lead to him resenting you. Or maybe he will decide you should do something that doesn't interest you.
My ex tried to tell me what I should do. I left him as fast as I could because I didn't want to be married to a controlling person.
My husband doesn't read for pleasure. That is his choice because he is an adult.
I don't like fishing so I don't fish. He likes fishing.
Now yes, he knows I always have books. And other hobbies. I know he has his own hobbies.
We make it work. When he fishes I either read or work on one of my many hobbies.
So long story short: is forcing your husband to read a book more important than him being happy?
Suggest, find books on his hobbies or things he likes, but do not tell him he has to read.
Is his not reading books a marriage breaker?
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I think you may have taken this post a bit too seriously. "Forcing" is a bit different than "encouraging". In no way would I force him to do something but to push him a little bit to give something unknown a try? Of course!
Divorce him because he won't ever become a reader? That's a little drastic. We've been married 12 years (amazing relationship btw) with two young boys. I couldn't have designed my soul mate myself better (I hit the jackpot with this guy). But encourage him to try new things? You bet! That's what we do for each other. How boring would a relationship be if we just sat passive in our old habits and never encouraged one another to try new things, especially together!
And yes, I've tried many things he is interested in (for his sake), and ended up loving them (boating, fishing, UTV'ing, etc). Now they are activities we do as a family because we all enjoy them. As stated above, he has already decided that even though he "feels" he is not interested, he wants to give it a try (as we do with many things in our family when we have doubts -- we try). So my question was (if you re-read my post) how can I help him get over his fears of feeling like he won't be able to commit, or make him realize it's not as difficult as he thinks, and good ways to encourage him to keep at it and not give up too soon.
Barry (above) had a great suggestion to start him off with short stories (that answers directly to his fear of commitment of a long book) and was a very helpful suggestion.
Your post however, just made me feel like I've been scolded by a teacher or worse (my mother).