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I don't know if this will help at this point, but....
I handle my iTunes settings the opposite way. I rip my own music and DVDs (and don't listen to audiobooks). I only purchase songs from iTunes when they are bonus tracks or otherwise unobtainable on CD. I also have a Zune, and don't want to maintain multiple libraries of media.
So, I allow iTunes to manage its library, but none of my media goes into it. I uncheck the option to copy files into the media library when they are added. I keep a folder on my hard drive called "Media", with "Music", "Video", "Pictures" etc underneath it. All of my manually ripped media goes into those folders. I then use the "Add folder to library" action to manually sync whenever I add new material.
The end result is that when I transfer to another computer, I just copy that media folder. iTunes does its own thing with Apple music files but everything else is all in a consistent and reliable place. (With the latest versions of iTunes, it is monkeying with the tags I've created, but that's a totally separate issue.)
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