Quote:
Originally Posted by Gregg Bell
Her vulnerability her inability to tolerate ridicule had led her to kill another human being.
#1) Her vulnerability, her inability to tolerate ridicule, had led her to kill another human being.
#2) Her vulnerability, her inability to tolerate ridicule had led her to kill another human being.
#3) another way
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I wouldn't use any of yours. I would use mine:
1)
Her vulnerability, including an inability to tolerate ridicule, had led her to kill another human being.
Another point: You use too many pronouns in one sentence.
By Greg Bell and Don Broyles
