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Old 10-09-2015, 12:15 AM   #123
gmw
cacoethes scribendi
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gregg Bell View Post
I feel like I'm about to get run out of town on a rail!

You guys! I've abandoned my old blurb in favor of Catlady's. I explained all this in post #99 but it seems you all missed it (understandable, since many posts followed that).

Here it is (just ever so slightly tweaked): [...]
Would that be the same rail that the conversation is on? Once a conversation gets going it can be hard to derail it.

Your final version reads better than the #99 variations. Except this sentence: "As the baby’s health fades, Annie grows increasingly alarmed, but can she convince anyone to take her word against Monroe’s?" That feels a bit convoluted to me.
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