[WT Sharpe]

I worked with a fellow who headed for the elevators whenever he felt the need to release those toxic emissions. Not so great if you saw him walking off just as the doors closed. And we had one woman of mature years who would catch unsuspecting people alone in the elevators and ask them if they'd like to hear her "duet." In my first meeting with her I said I suppose that would be okay at which point she got in my face and began howling like a soprano with her foot caught under a baby elephant, and alternating that with a bass line that sounded like a really angry and constipated Batman. Traveling the elevators in our building always incurred a certain degree of personal risk.