Quote:
Originally Posted by Dr. Drib
That IS a comma splice.   
....You may also choose to use a semi-colon between the splice and then a comma after the word 'fact'; that is, if you don't want two sentences.
Comma-splices are bad for one's health. They cause indigestion and excessive gas. Avoid them at all costs. |
That comma splice
is DEFINITELY giving me indigestion.
I recommend two sentences for those uncomfortable with semi-colons. I use them constantly; (see?) it's because my brain just loves long sentences, and my usage is an attempt to stop myself from drivelling on endlessly. But, I have forced myself, in my more-academic writing (blogs, toots, FAQ's, handbook, yadda) to use something like Hemingway or the USArmy's reading-level analysis tool, to force myself to write shorter, clearer sentences for that type of mental digestion. I aim for, Gods help us, a 6th-grade reading comprehension level. That always, or almost always, means shorter sentences, fewer commas, no semi-colons. Compound sentences seem to instantly move the reading comprehension level up 2-3-4 grades. So: if you're writing literary fiction, grand, but if you're writing genre, I'd really recommend a description that's shorter, punchier, and easy to digest.
We all need to face the fact that the industrial-strength writing that we grew up reading is a thing of the past. Everything is short, fast, don't-ask-the-reader-to-read-compound-sentences now.
But mostly, that sentence with that comma splice is just BAD. It's wrong. Yes, it's a draft, but....it hurts my eyes to look at it. (n.b.: granted, we're discussing the content and context, more than grammar and punctuation here, and we're all being nitpicky. But sometimes, you can get amazing punch just by tightening a line, a sentence, a fragment....ya just never know how much great grammar and punctuation can do for ya.)
Hitch