[gmw]

Title trouble is to be expected, although that will vary with the story. Sometimes the title becomes obvious as you are writing ... and sometimes not. At least one of my editing/rewrite passes is spent considering/reconsidering the title and blurb. Once I find a title I like I tend to stick with it, but a more professional approach might be to choose something catchy and distinctive rather than necessarily something you like.

As for cover and editing. If you can't afford a professional you must find suitable alternatives (suitably picky friends or lots and lots of carefully spent time). The reaction described by meeera is entirely predictable and expected. With the huge proliferation of work out there, most readers will have little patience with anything that smacks of lazy production. (The quite reasonable logic here is: if you can't be bothered presenting your story well, then why should the reader be bothered?) There is no time to visit everything coming out (almost 53,000 new literature and fiction releases on Amazon in the last 30 days!), so readers will automatically discard on the most superficial of criteria just to cut that selection back to something more manageable.

I might also add that statements like "I think you are missing out on a good story" are rather missing the point. We're all missing out on good stories. Of that 53,000 there are bound to be quite a few good stories, but we can't get through all of them. Our job as independent publishers is try our best to stand out from that crowd, and that means looking good as well as being good. It also means accepting that most of the time it's not going to work. Move on. Write your next story. And try again. Practice makes perfect - we hope.

Which brings me to your stated "unconventional style". This is going to mean an automatic rejection from many readers - especially on the first novel from an otherwise unknown author. Unconventional means that it takes time for the reader to settle in, and you don't have that time when you're still trying to make a first impression. Also, when it's your first novel it is not yet obvious that this is an intentional lack of convention, you haven't proven that you can do anything else.

I suggest that you don't waste too much time fretting over this first novella. Learn from it and start work on your next book. Eventually you may publish something that gains attention and people may look back over your earlier works with a more patient eye.

Disclaimer: This is all from someone that has made plenty of mistakes, and I expect I will make plenty more.