Thread: Silliness Escape Committee
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Old 12-22-2008, 05:55 AM   #407
LazyScot
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"Quick, the liquidizers, " said Pandaborg-B as he and the rest of the Pandaborg grabbed the boxes, tore the open and turned on the liquidizers.

"Llama Kung Fu" said Dorothy the llama and all the llamas, apart from the still drunk Arthur, promptly started the most amazing martial arts high-speed movements kicking flying Kumquats into the walls or trampling them into a pulp.

"karma llarma chameleon" giggled Arthur, who attempted to kick four different kumquats, one with each of his legs, and totally failed to connect with any of them. The topologically impossible movement that resulted caused the kumquats to completely miss him, and he collapsed back onto the floor.

Between the llama's feet and the actions of the liquidizer wielding Pandaborg, a small safe area was created around the door to the server room, amidst the blizzard of killer kumquats.

"Definitely needs vodka." Slurred Arthur, (who had been poured into the VentureOne to wheel him out of the building) as he drank his way through the by-product of the liquidizers.

Quickly LazyScot (who was still wheeling the VentureOne) and Nekokami dived into the server room. Inside sitting conveniently next to its carrier case (which looked like a dubious and cheap prop from Space 1999) were three brains, all of the right size.

"Eeewwww, " said LazyScot squeamishly as he carefully scooped up the brain and placed it into the travelling container. "GeoffC had darn'd well better appreciate this, " said LazyScot as he placed the container into the VentureOne.

"Ooohhh Cocktail ice?" slurred Arthur as he attempted to open the container.

"NOO! " shouted LazyScot firmly, as he moved the container into the luggage compartment at the back of the VentureOne.

Back outside the server room, the group, retraced its steps into the lab. "Vodka. Definitely wants vodka, " hiccupped Arthur at an inopportune moment. "Oh thanks."

"1954 Belles of St Trinians." Shouted LazyScot. And with that the machinery went into overdrive and started churning out large numbers of hockey stick wielding fourth formers. Backing out of the lab, LazyScot added "The sixth formers have Arab Boy through there, but you'll have to get rid of all those kumquats." With that a raucous cheering arose and the fourth formers headed off in the other direction waving their hockey sticks to devastating affect eliminating very large numbers of kumquats, and taking at least half the kumquat blizzard with them.

"Girls, Girls. Be careful. Oh be careful." Said a very worried Miss Fritton following after the forth formers.

"i don't even want to know," said Zelda as the group slowly fought their way back to the door.

"Hic. Haec. Hoc." Said an eruditely drunk Arthur through his Kumquat Vodka cocktails.

"Just a minute, I wanted to look for something, " said LazyScot as the group backed up to the reception, and passed a computer. "A French Keyboard? Of all the impossible… Zelda, where is the 'a'?" And after about 30 seconds searching, continued "no that's okay -- found it." With that he typed in a few words, clicked on a few links and then downloaded something to his USB key.

"Whilst you're at that computer, could you just run a program for me?" asked the BatAI. "The icon on the top right-hand corner; the one that looks like a pair of scissors cutting a network wire?"

"Alright, but get the engine running," replied LazyScot as, under the dying embers of blizzard of kumquats, they made it back to the bat pickup and loaded on the VentureOne.

"Has anyone seen Zelda?" asked Nekokami, nervously.

"She's just---" said LazyScot, stopping abruptly and looking room. "She was here just a minute ago." And with that Pandaborg-B and the Pandaborg Soldier from the Knights of Literature and the Pandaborg Builder from the Mall disappeared back into the building wielding only their liquidizers, and almost immediately appear together with a slightly Kumquat splattered Zelda pushing a large trolley with a very large brown sack on it. The sack appeared to be snoring.

"ask me no questions and i'll tell you no lies." Zelda responded to LazyScot's enquiring look.

"Deal, " said LazyScot, as they loaded everything into the now overloaded BatPickUp. Reflecting on the last few minutes, LazyScot turned to the BatAI and asked, "Do you have anything to say for yourself?" as they drover rapidly way from the buildings.

He was answered with silence.

"Right. Where now? And think long and hard about where you take us…"

There was a dull "whump" from the direction of the buildings, that quivered and collapsed in on themselves, and out of which came a horde of hockey stick wielding schoolgirls followed by a headmistress.

"Well?" asked LazyScot, glaring at the BatAI.

"It was doing work for The Knights of Literature. And I'm not convinced that they do no evil."

"Okay. I'll let you off with that one, " said LazyScot as the continued rapidly down the road. "Where now?"
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