You asked for some tips, so...
I'm sorry, but this is just absolutely awful. Let's look at the first few lines of it, shall we?
Quote:
There was me, excited to start my first day at university
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So far, so good. One reasonably grammatically-correct sentence, although the purist would say that you should use "There was I", rather than "There was me".
Quote:
Excelled with the prospects of living by myself
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You can't use the verb "Excelled" in this context; it doesn't make any sense.
Quote:
...
I was originally lucky to get into uni, I required 3 A's where as I only got 3 C's
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Two errors here:
1. "I required" is a run-on sentence. You need a full stop, or at least a semi-colon, after the word "uni".
2. Should be "whereas", not "where as".
Quote:
My parents always expected me to go into the promise land of university...
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Should be "promised", not "promise".
Quote:
but for me nor a passion or a dream
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Should be "neither a passion nor a dream"
Quote:
but just a boy fulfilling his parents dream
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Should be "parents' dream", with an apostrophe.
Grammar, punctuation and spelling are a writer's basic toolbox. I'm afraid this is an abject failure on all three counts. If your language skills are as poor as this example suggests, I would strongly urge you to get your work proof-read by someone a little more knowledgeable in these areas. Nobody is going to read this as it stands.