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Old 02-26-2015, 06:33 AM   #8485
orlok
Close to the Edit!
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Join Date: Jan 2011
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I'm hoping these haven't been posted before - quite a few of them made me giggle.

10 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Sanity (Insanity?):

1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.

2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.

3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that.

4. Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy".

5. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.

6. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go".

7. Sing Along At The Opera.

8. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won! I Won!"

9. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!"

10. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go."
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