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Maybe some questions in the interest of discussion.

So was Archer actually a victim of social norms?

Spoiler:

I didn't find so. As treadlightly said, Archer had numerous opportunities to make things right without pushing the envelope that much.

Was this book a romance? What was romantic about it?

Spoiler:

Not for me. It had so little romance in it. Forced marriages and inept social norms do not make romance for me. Archer was in love with something, but not any of the other characters in the book. I suppose the last bit of wistfulness at the end could be construed romantic, but wouldn’t the romantic individual come to address their previous stupidity when the opportunity was there. Friendship in the end was possible, but Archer did nothing about it. Being a victim of himself is tragic and not romantic.

Did you like this book?

Spoiler:

I wanted to like this book, but Archer was just such a dummy/twit/prat. The allusions to the norms were there, but there were so many opportunities for him to make right that it was just irritating. There was way too much of the eight dangerous words for me: I don’t care what happens to these people.
While I know Wharton often wrote about the privileged class and was a bit of an anti-privilege satirist, the book did not come off as that to me. Outside of one quote which I can’t find that I thought was hilarious in its awkwardness, the book was mostly tedium for me. I appreciate Wharton’s writing. I really enjoyed Ethan Frome. This was a letdown after having read that one. It just left me so flat and uncaring.