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Old 11-24-2014, 10:53 PM   #1
Gregg Bell
Gregg Bell
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Posts: 2,266
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Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Itasca, Illinois
Device: Kindle Touch 7, Sony PRS300, Fire HD8 Tablet
Does this new blurb work better?

Some of you pointed out my original blurb for this cover didn't get "romantic suspense" (the book's genre) across. So I wrote a new blurb. Does it work better? Work well? Here's the cover:



Here's the original blurb (I shortened it):

What can a mother do when she has no money and a dangerously sick kid?

She can make a mistake.

In a moment of desperation, cleaning lady Phoebe Jackson tries to pawn the diamond-bejeweled Rolex she found in a mobster's locker. Turns out the watch is a fake, but the mobster isn't—and he's on to her.


And here's the new blurb:

What can a mother do when she has no money and a dangerously sick kid?

She can make a mistake.

In a moment of desperation, cleaning lady Phoebe Jackson tries to pawn the diamond-bejeweled Rolex she found in a mobster's locker. Turns out the watch is a fake, but the mobster isn't—and he's on to her.

But that’s not the only mistake Phoebe makes as she gets drawn into Michael “Fingertips” Contini’s dangerous world of wealth and power. She might be falling in love with him.

Her ex’s best friend, ex-cop Brent, tries to warn her but she’s in too deep—or is she?
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