
Researchers are working long and hard on our behalf to determine whether or not cell phones are safe to use. We know distracted driving is a problem. And we know that radio emissions are dangerous/are not dangerous/are dangerous... with results apparently depending on sunspot activity during the research cycle.
Well, now if you are in those tender developmental years, there's another new danger that has been discovered, and I'm happy to warn you in this public service announcement. Brace yourself.
"According to the latest cell phone-health related study, researchers claim cell phones make adolescents' hands sweat." Be warned! Fortunately, if you are an adult, you have escaped this dangerous situation. "According to the study, adults did not show significant changes before and after using cell phones."
But I'm ever suspicious of research results. I think they might have left out one variable in the study. I wonder how many adolescents happened to be talking to a member of the opposite sex that made them nervous just to pick up the phone? Heck, I can remember times as a teen that my hands would get sweaty just thinking about making a call to a certain important person!
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