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montsnmags · 11-13-2008, 09:19 PM

Seeing as pshrynk keeps trying to get the laddie at the door to charge me $300, I figured I'd bypass his irritating expectation of recompense for my gift of an audience with myself by seeking one of those no-doubt extraordinarily accurate alternatives - the online personality test. The results are in - apparently I'm a neurotic introvert retreated so far back into his safety-closet his arse is butting into Narnia. The online test is called IPIP-NEO, which, since it has NEO in the end, which is an anagram of "ONE", and has two "P"s in it, I am going to henceforth call it the "ONE-eyed, ONE-horned, flying Purple People eater" test.

Now, pshrynk will no doubt come along and try to discredit the Purple People Eater test, but remember that, being a doctor, he carts his wallet around in front of him in a gold-plated, diamond-encrusted wheelbarrow. Also, who are you going to trust: a highly-trained, dedicated, workaholic pshrynk, or a neurotic introvert? I rest my case (blindly assuming you're going with me).

The test also, by coincidence, had 300 questions, which I figure works out to a $1 per question relative to a visit to pshrynk. This sounded about right to me. You end up with five category scores, and six sub-category scores which is 30 scores. That's $10 per psychological observation. Sounds about right to me too.

Anyway, my results (because, as we all know, the defining characteristic of an introvert is to expose himself in all his ugly glory to as many people as possible), were as follows:

EXTRAVERSION: 1% LOW
- Friendliness: 8% LOW
- Gregariousness: 0% LOW
- Assertiveness: 3% LOW
- Activity Level: 1% LOW
- Excitement Seeking: 4% LOW
- Cheerfulness: 15% LOW

AGREEABLENESS: 55%
- Trust: 20% LOW
- Morality: 80% HIGH
- Altruism: 25% LOW
- Cooperation: 31% LOW
- Modesty: 88% HIGH

CONSCIENTIOUSNESS: 45% AVERAGE
- Self-Efficacy: 75% HIGH
- Orderliness: 45% AVERAGE
- Dutifulness: 63% AVERAGE
- Achievement Striving: 11% LOW
- Self-Discipline: 1% LOW
- Cautiousness: 98% HIGH

NEUROTICISM: 99% HIGH
- Anxiety: 98% HIGH
- Anger: 81% HIGH
- Depression: 99% HIGH
- Self-Consciousness: 99% HIGH
- Immoderation: 99% HIGH
- Vulnerability: 82% HIGH

OPENNESS TO EXPERIENCE: 67% AVERAGE
- Imagination: 79% HIGH
- Artistic Interests: 63% AVERAGE
- Emotionality: 27% LOW
- Adventurousness: 16% LOW
- Intellect: 71% HIGH
- Liberalism: 94% HIGH

So, what does this tell you? Well, I think we'd all agree that it would be fair to judge my results above as a benchmark for true normality. Thus, if you complete the test, and compare the results to mine, you will be able to tell if you're totally climb-the-trees-flinging-monkey-shit-at-the-camera crazy, or so arse-clenchingly sane we'd need a mallet to peg you in a round hole. Either way, I prescribe two Zany Carter Deluxes, and call me for dinner if pain persists.

Cheers,
Marc

11-13-2008, 09:19 PM	#1488
montsnmags Grand Sorcerer Posts: 10,155 Karma: 4632658 Join Date: Nov 2007 Device: none	Seeing as pshrynk keeps trying to get the laddie at the door to charge me $300, I figured I'd bypass his irritating expectation of recompense for my gift of an audience with myself by seeking one of those no-doubt extraordinarily accurate alternatives - the online personality test. The results are in - apparently I'm a neurotic introvert retreated so far back into his safety-closet his arse is butting into Narnia. The online test is called IPIP-NEO, which, since it has NEO in the end, which is an anagram of "ONE", and has two "P"s in it, I am going to henceforth call it the "ONE-eyed, ONE-horned, flying Purple People eater" test. Now, pshrynk will no doubt come along and try to discredit the Purple People Eater test, but remember that, being a doctor, he carts his wallet around in front of him in a gold-plated, diamond-encrusted wheelbarrow. Also, who are you going to trust: a highly-trained, dedicated, workaholic pshrynk, or a neurotic introvert? I rest my case (blindly assuming you're going with me). The test also, by coincidence, had 300 questions, which I figure works out to a $1 per question relative to a visit to pshrynk. This sounded about right to me. You end up with five category scores, and six sub-category scores which is 30 scores. That's $10 per psychological observation. Sounds about right to me too. Anyway, my results (because, as we all know, the defining characteristic of an introvert is to expose himself in all his ugly glory to as many people as possible), were as follows: EXTRAVERSION: 1% LOW - Friendliness: 8% LOW - Gregariousness: 0% LOW - Assertiveness: 3% LOW - Activity Level: 1% LOW - Excitement Seeking: 4% LOW - Cheerfulness: 15% LOW AGREEABLENESS: 55% - Trust: 20% LOW - Morality: 80% HIGH - Altruism: 25% LOW - Cooperation: 31% LOW - Modesty: 88% HIGH CONSCIENTIOUSNESS: 45% AVERAGE - Self-Efficacy: 75% HIGH - Orderliness: 45% AVERAGE - Dutifulness: 63% AVERAGE - Achievement Striving: 11% LOW - Self-Discipline: 1% LOW - Cautiousness: 98% HIGH NEUROTICISM: 99% HIGH - Anxiety: 98% HIGH - Anger: 81% HIGH - Depression: 99% HIGH - Self-Consciousness: 99% HIGH - Immoderation: 99% HIGH - Vulnerability: 82% HIGH OPENNESS TO EXPERIENCE: 67% AVERAGE - Imagination: 79% HIGH - Artistic Interests: 63% AVERAGE - Emotionality: 27% LOW - Adventurousness: 16% LOW - Intellect: 71% HIGH - Liberalism: 94% HIGH So, what does this tell you? Well, I think we'd all agree that it would be fair to judge my results above as a benchmark for true normality. Thus, if you complete the test, and compare the results to mine, you will be able to tell if you're totally climb-the-trees-flinging-monkey-shit-at-the-camera crazy, or so arse-clenchingly sane we'd need a mallet to peg you in a round hole. Either way, I prescribe two Zany Carter Deluxes, and call me for dinner if pain persists. Cheers, Marc