Quote:
OMG! OMG!
Amazon has shipped something to me ONE WHOLE DAMN DAY LATE! 4 whole somethings! I don't CARE if Atlanta is snowed in; I don't CARE if thousands of small children and other humans are trapped in automobiles on freeways, freezing to death, coated with ice, having to pee by the side of the road, I want my damn vitamins! RIGHT NOW!
They've BROKEN A CONTRACT WITH ME!
Oh, the HUMANITY!
So, Stitch: maybe we can get a nice, class-action lawsuit goin', eh?
Hitch
(for those that don't get the joke, just ignore this one).
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There were two Buddhist monks walking along a path beside the river, chatting, a novice and an old Abbot. They came to a river crossing where a woman was in tears, afraid to step into the stream. The old Monk picked her up on his back and carried her over, setting her down on the other side.
The young Monk was mortified that the old man would touch a woman, something absolutely forbidden by their order. He was seething with anger, and refused to speak. They continued on, but the young Monk still refused to speak. Mile after mile... The older Monk could feel the anger in his young novice but said nothing.
Finally, several hours later, the young Monk turned to the older one and shouted,
"You violated our rules by touching that woman, even picking her up!"
The old Monk turned to him and said,
"Yes, and I put her down on the other side of the river. You've been carrying her for miles..."
Stitchawl