Quote:
Originally Posted by Chi Cygni
Oooh I feel for you. Tbh, isn't it super annoying at times? Instead of being happy you're happy so you can enjoy your new gadget even more you have to explain yourself and justify. Anyway. We shall be strong and order stuff anyway!
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I read a very wise article once, where it was pointed out people have a natural tendency not to appreciate things which are important to others but not to themselves - and thus take a negative stance on decisions where they really shouldn't be involved at all, because they don't care or even know anything about the matter they are involved in. They just say no, because it isn't important for them, so they don't understand or even try to understand why it would be to someone else.
This is why it can be a mistake for spouses to decide everything together, or meddle with every decision the other is making. Chances are you will block something you don't deem important, you don't know anything about, and you don't care at all, but the other finds very important for a multitude of reasons. Be it Kindles or apparel or cars or whatnot, if it isn't our passion, we can't possibly understand what the other person is going through.
To quote another (not so serious) source, Dr. Phil once said, if a matter is 90% important to once spouse and 10% important to the other, the one who finds it 90% important should be allowed to decide because it would be worse for them to be denied than for the other to be overruled. By this logic if you really want and need a Kindle, and the partner really doesn't suffer that much if you do get it, you should be allowed to get the Kindle.
Now, of course every successful partnership requires checks and balances (so that, say, one partner doesn't bankrupt the whole enterprise), but the basic idea is really good in my opinion. We may not always understand why our partner finds something important, but if it seems like more important for them to have it, than for us to stop them, let them have it.