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No, you can't change this behavior in any settings. It is how calibre works, deep, deep down.
Calibre doesn't update metadata stored inside books in the calibre library. Only in the database metadata.db and the opf-files. Except when you polish or convert a book. You can convert from one format to the same format. Or use the plug-in "Update Epub".
There are two reasons for this: It is much faster and it allows you to store books in the library without changing them. Ever! Except for the filename.
When you save books to disc or send to device the new copies of the books have the updated metadata inside
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