MobileRead Forums - View Single Post - Silliness Friday's question of the Day 03 Oct 08

LazyScot · 10-03-2008, 02:58 PM

<scene: deep inside a mountain, lit by subdued lighting, uniformed military men pour over large screens, studying tracks, and analysing threats and drinking near lethal amounts of coffee.>

"Sir, we have a problem, " said a young officer, in clipped controlled terms pointing at his display. "It's small, moving fast and appears to be on an intercept course with some of our space assets. It seems to have come out of nowhere, and is not broadcasting any signals at all. I recommend treating it as hostile, and going immediately to code red."

The senior officer strode over, and studied the display. "I concur. This is it. Code Red." And with that she hit the alarm button and across the complex sounded the alarm signal – 99 red ballons by Nena (apparently the protest aspect of the song was lost on the military). "What are our intercept options?" she asked several operators at a different desk who had just received the tracking data, as various doors throughout the complex started pointlessly closing, affording the chance for people to hurl themselves dramatically through the diminishing opening risking limbs in the pursuit of the director's desire for added tension.

"We have a flight of F-22s just about within range, approximately 2 minutes intercept at max speed. And the experimental anti-satellite missiles based at Site 43 should be able to acquired lock." Replied one of the officers without looking up from the console.

"Order the F-22s to intercept, and send details to Site 43 and ask for their hit probability. Alter the major agencies we have a category one event underway."

"Aye, Aye. Ma'am" replies the officer and promptly started issuing commands, as the other comms officers start passing the messages on.

"Right. What is the apparent target? Is it still on the same track?"

"The target appears to be Fred, Ma'am. It is remaining on track, though is jinking rather a lot; it may be trying to avoid Site 43 acquiring lock"

"Ma'am?" Enquired a junior comms officer.

"Yes?"

"We're getting a message from CDC and EPA. It appears that the general area of the launch is showing serious damage, both Biological and Chemical, Ma'am"

"Okay. Let's go Ultra. The F-22s are free to fire." And with that Nena was replaced with 2 Minutes to Midnight in what might have been an attempt at irony, and results in approximately two thirds of the personal nodding their heads to the beat of the song.

"75 seconds to intercept. Site 43 reports provisional lock, estimating a 65% probability and are requesting a go for a first launch. Ma'am"

"Give them the go. Oh, I suppose someone ought to tell potus."

"Now we wait....."

10-03-2008, 02:58 PM	#7
LazyScot DSil Posts: 3,201 Karma: 6895096 Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: Hants, UK Device: Kindle, Cybook	<scene: deep inside a mountain, lit by subdued lighting, uniformed military men pour over large screens, studying tracks, and analysing threats and drinking near lethal amounts of coffee.> "Sir, we have a problem, " said a young officer, in clipped controlled terms pointing at his display. "It's small, moving fast and appears to be on an intercept course with some of our space assets. It seems to have come out of nowhere, and is not broadcasting any signals at all. I recommend treating it as hostile, and going immediately to code red." The senior officer strode over, and studied the display. "I concur. This is it. Code Red." And with that she hit the alarm button and across the complex sounded the alarm signal – 99 red ballons by Nena (apparently the protest aspect of the song was lost on the military). "What are our intercept options?" she asked several operators at a different desk who had just received the tracking data, as various doors throughout the complex started pointlessly closing, affording the chance for people to hurl themselves dramatically through the diminishing opening risking limbs in the pursuit of the director's desire for added tension. "We have a flight of F-22s just about within range, approximately 2 minutes intercept at max speed. And the experimental anti-satellite missiles based at Site 43 should be able to acquired lock." Replied one of the officers without looking up from the console. "Order the F-22s to intercept, and send details to Site 43 and ask for their hit probability. Alter the major agencies we have a category one event underway." "Aye, Aye. Ma'am" replies the officer and promptly started issuing commands, as the other comms officers start passing the messages on. "Right. What is the apparent target? Is it still on the same track?" "The target appears to be Fred, Ma'am. It is remaining on track, though is jinking rather a lot; it may be trying to avoid Site 43 acquiring lock" "Ma'am?" Enquired a junior comms officer. "Yes?" "We're getting a message from CDC and EPA. It appears that the general area of the launch is showing serious damage, both Biological and Chemical, Ma'am" "Okay. Let's go Ultra. The F-22s are free to fire." And with that Nena was replaced with 2 Minutes to Midnight in what might have been an attempt at irony, and results in approximately two thirds of the personal nodding their heads to the beat of the song. "75 seconds to intercept. Site 43 reports provisional lock, estimating a 65% probability and are requesting a go for a first launch. Ma'am" "Give them the go. Oh, I suppose someone ought to tell potus." "Now we wait....."