Quote:
Originally Posted by Dr. Drib
That one doesn't work: You must have only one sentence. Please re-write.
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It looks as though Freeshadow meant to type a comma instead of a period.
Freeshadow: I hope this doesn't offend you because I'm only trying to help.
Replace the period after
novel with a comma, delete the floating hyphen that follows it, replace the word
trough with
through and add the possessive to
victims so that it appears as
victim's. Then your submission will be perfect.
I'd also specify what
it is at the beginning of the sentence.
Fair copy:
Quote:
"This tome is so boring that it could pass for a modern novel," thought the PI while leafing through the victim's diary.
—Freeshadow (not Prestidigitweeze)
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If you like, I'll delete this post after you work on your sentence.