Quote:
Originally Posted by speakingtohe
Now,now. Every one is entitled to an odd smooshy moment 
Helen |
I suspect BMB was talking as much about the form as the content, since the line breaks and syntax made your post read like a conversational modern poem. (That's a compliment, not an insult.)
If you don't believe me, have a look at Frank O'Hara:
"Poem (Lana Turner Has Collapsed!)"
Also, your poem/post is more like a modern litany than an ode. For an example of that, see Allen Ginsberg's "America." I won't link to it and will only quote excerpts because of the copious four-letter words and MR-unfriendly political content, but notice how the poem unfolds and then look at your post:
Quote:
America I've given you all and now I'm nothing.
America two dollars and twenty-seven cents January 17, 1956. . . .
America stop pushing I know what I'm doing. . . .
When can I go into the supermarket and buy what I need with my good looks?
America after all it is you and I who are perfect not the next world. . . .
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